by Heather Avis
Hennepin County Library paperback 216 pages
genre: non-fiction, adoption journey
I don't remember where I read a review for this book or heard about it, but I'm so glad I got it from the library! What an honest and powerful look at this family's journey to parenthood. Although I can't relate to their specific experiences of infertility, adoption, or parenting children with Down Syndrome, Avis' writing drew me in and really impacted me. I can think of several people to recommend this book to!
page 71 - "I would soon learn the need I felt to defend our decision and convince people of our daughter's worth came from within myself. In the days that followed our big scary yes, I was the one who needed the most convincing that we'd made the right choice." Kudos to her and her husband for agreeing to adopt a child with Down Syndrome *and* needing open heart surgery! And kudos for her being completely honest about the doubts and fears as well as the joys and rewards!
page 89 - "Every parent I know does everything in their power to keep their kids safe and alive. It's basically a parent's number-one job." Sometimes when I struggle with other people's parenting choices, I have to remind myself that we all (mostly) love our kids and are doing our best for them. I say mostly because there are some truly messed-up humans who hurt their own children instead of caring for them.
page 113 - "But in that moment, I also knew I needed to be careful not to let my own comfort get in the way of others' needs. I was reminded that when I'm uncomfortable, I have the chance to know God more fully." I love this attitude! I need to develop it in my own life.
page 118 - "And maybe my gain would ultimately result in the best kind of loss of all - the loss of my selfish desires." This line really resonated with me! I struggle with my own selfishness, yet I keep returning to it. If I can ever truly LET GO of my selfish desire and seek God's perfect will, I know that I will be so blessed and joyful. Yet I continue to struggle with this.
page 159 - "So many of us have a child who is challenging to enjoy. Friends, I want to tell you that it's okay." This made me think of a time when I shared with someone that when Morgan was a baby, I understood how some people shake their babies. They looked at me in horror! I explained that I would never have done it; I knew enough to put the crying baby in the crib and walk away. They really didn't understand what I was saying . . . and I thought I'd better watch what I say and to whom. Sometimes, we need to acknowledge and talk about the things that we struggle with. It's important that we support one another as parents!
page 182 - "You can't let your feelings get in the way of the truth of God's goodness." I love how Heather and her husband Josh work together. What a godly couple! I love their faith and love!
page 186 - "There is just something spectacular about a human growing another human." Amen! Pregnancy is miraculous! Having experienced it three times, it makes me sad that some women who truly want this experience are unable to . . . and others see it as an inconvenience to be aborted.
page 215 - "Eight years ago, God shined a light into my wilderness, and Josh and I stepped off our path of easy, normal, and nice to go after it. He took our muddied clothes, tired souls, and broken hearts, and from our humble offerings created a crazy masterpiece. He took our meager yes and used it to stir up hearts and change lives. There is absolutely no way to know the ripple effect we create when we say yes to God's seemingly terrifying invitation." Awesome! I want to be obedient to God. I need to pray and listen for His leading in my life!
I love all of page 216, but I'll just grab a few lines:
"The truth is, I'm average at best. But I serve a grand God, and I've been lucky enough to answer when He calls. He does the rest."
"I believe that at some point in our lives each of us has the opportunity to leave our comfortable path and head into the wilderness."
"I think about how lucky all of us are when we finally allow God to gently push us toward the places where he's waiting to be discovered."
This book was such a blessing! Even in the acknowledgments, I love what she says to her husband and to Jesus . . . just cool!
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