The Tea Girl of Hummingbird Lane

by Lisa See
Scott County Library hardcover 370 pages
genre: Historical fiction
published: 2017

I got this book for my sister Ann for her book club (Scott County Libraries rock! Hennepin County is a bit more ponderous in this pandemic era.) I decided to read it, too, and I'm glad I did! I've also read her books Shanghai Girls and Snow Flower and the Secret Fan. Now I'm curious to read some of her other titles! This lady can write!

Li-yan (known as "Girl") is a member of the Akha people, living in China's mountains and harvesting tea. The book follows her life and the lives of others near to her over the course of a few decades. If you want more info, read here.

Page 136 - "But since our lives are out of alignment with the world, today we must endure a visit from the strangest creatures of all: missionaries. Akhas are taught never to hate, but this particular group of foreigners, who tell us our practices are evil and there is only one god, challenge my patience."

Though it makes me sad to think of Christian missionaries as the "bad guys," I can totally see the culture clash and misunderstandings. I believe missionaries are more sensitive nowadays to how they share the gospel.

Page 158 - Ugh! The horrible things people say to adoptive parents! When Connie Davis writes the letter to her mother and shares some of the questions people have asked her, I knew that the fiction had basis in truth. "'Are you the babysitter?' 'Does this one belong to you? I thought she might be lost.' 'How much did she cost?' 'Is it hard for you to love her when she doesn't look like you?' People can be so cruel and unthinking. But here's what bothers me the most. Haley doesn't yet realize what they're saying, but she will. What will I tell her then? How will I comfort her?"

Page 230 - When Li-Yan and her new husband are in California shopping and eating out: "Wow! I so like this American word. Wow! Wow! Wow!"

That just made me smile.

Page 313 - "How your dad and I felt when we got you. What you meant to us then. What you mean to us now. In the months leading up to the phone call that told us we could come and get you, I did everything I could to understand Chinese culture. I went on a walking tour of Chinatown, I devoured Amy Tan's books, I watched Chinese movies."

Although this is in Haley's essay, it made me think of the fierce love that moms have for their children, whether biological or adoptive. A lot of this book was about motherhood and especially mother-daughter relationships.

Page 353 - "When our noodles arrive, I follow Sean's example and pour steaming tea over my chopsticks and other tableware, then toss the dirty liquid on the ground. The alternative would be the trots or worse. Every pandemic in the history of the world has come from China." (emphasis mine)

This really caught my eye! I don't know if that's a true statement, but coming two years before Covid-19, it definitely jumped out at me when I read it.

Page 368 - This is part of the Acknowledgements, but I wanted to include it. "I am hugely indebted to the writings of Paul W. Lewis, who served as a missionary to the Akha with the American Baptist Foreign Mission Society in Burma from 1947 to 1966. . . "

How interesting that she credits a missionary as a research source.

This was an excellent book!

Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage: Unlocking the Secrets to Life, Love, and Marriage

by Mark Gungor
Hennepin County Library paperback 275 pages
genre: Non-fiction, Christian, marriage
published: 2008

My pastor has mentioned this book and author many times. I have enjoyed this video from one of his sessions before: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3XjUFYxSxDk

The book is worth reading, but it wasn't that helpful / interesting / informative to me. Perhaps because I've been married for over thirty years and we get along really well . . . this just didn't inspire me. That said, I tagged some spots. (The only note I jotted was "okay . . . good parts . . . sex / God-given gift . . . Not that funny . . . ")

The section on "Differences Foster Conflict" was one of the best sections in my opinion.


Chapter 11 is titled "What's Sex Got to Do with It?" He writes, "I must mention that there are two groups of people who take issue with my approach to this subject. The first are those representing academia. . . . It's not that I'm trying to be tawdry or crude (though I have frequently been accused of being so), it's that I think God created sex to be fun . . . The other group I seem to offend is the radically prudish religious crowd." He quotes from Ezekiel 23: 19-21 to point out how the Bible talks about this issue. It made me think of the time I read from the Song of Solomon to my mom (for the shock value for her - the Catholic Church had never shared that part of Scripture with her!) Later in the chapter he writes, "Let me say that I do understand that many are reticent to even bring up the subject of sex . . . because of the way sexuality has been abused in our culture." He has a lot of wisdom in this chapter.

In Chapter 16, this line caught my attention: "Virtually anyone can experience a wonderful sex life regardless of their past. But let's stop pretending that sex before marriage is no big deal and start telling people the truth - for two reasons: One, so that our kids can avoid the problem in the first place; and two, so those who have been negatively affected can learn how they can still succeed by changing the way they think about sex."

I don't think I'd spend time and money going to one of his workshops, but I am confident that his material resonates with a lot of other people! He has a positive, Biblical perspective on marriage.