The Bait of Satan: Living Free from the Deadly Trap of Offense

By: John Bevere

Copy loaned by friend, paperback, 286 pages plus notes and an 80+ page study guide

Published: 1994 (this version 2014)

Genre: non-fiction, Christian forgiveness

 

Several friends recommended this book to me, so I finally read it. But I'm a firm believer in "right time, right book" and I'm not struggling with unforgiveness or offense right now. Mostly, reading this made me feel that I definitely need to spend more time in God's Word!

 

Initially, I really liked the "declarations" at the end of each chapter. But after a while, it was hard for me to say them aloud . . . when it used words like "never" or "always." I can promise to always try, but I can't promise I will always do something. It's not like I can lie to the Lord! He knows me. But that's quibbling. The declarations were a mix of Scripture, promises, affirmations, etc. They show up on these pages: 3, 10-11, 21-22, 33-34, 47-48, 61-62, 73-74, 87-89, 103-104, 119-121, 131-132, 145-146, 157-158, 168-169, 179-180, and 182-183. I starred the ones on pages 47-48, so I'll share them here:

 

 I'm not sure how legible these will be, but there are many of these statements that I think are right on the target. 

 

I also think it can be powerful to speak aloud statements of fact and prayers to God.

 

As I said, I initially really liked the affirmations but as the book went on I read them silently and questioned the statement as well as my own heart. It made for some good prayer time, but it also frustrated me that each new chapter began as a testimonial for the book.

 

People were fawning over Bevere and how life-changing this book was for them.

 Forgiveness is absolutely crucial for one's one health and wellness in spirit and in mind (and unforgiveness can impact your physical well-being, too!). But if you're not dealing with unforgiveness or being offended, . . . then this book isn't for you.

 

I was wracking my brain. Who has hurt me? Who have I not forgiven?

 

Honestly, our current POTUS is the only name I came up with. I have a pretty hard heart toward him right now. I can pray about that, but it's not a relationship that needs reconciling . . . he doesn't know I exist and he would probably call me fat, stupid, and ugly if he did meet me . . . which would just make me angrier.

 

So I did put a lot of post-it notes in the book. Let's see what I marked (for a not-very-long book, it has taken me a LONG time to read this!)

 

Page 58: In other words, a believer who chooses to delight in the Word of God in the midst of adversity will avoid being offended. That person will be like a tree whose roots search deep to where the Spirit provides strength and nourishment.

 

Yes! Get into God's Word. That was my biggest takeaway.

 

Page 72: Jesus desires to heal our wounds. But we often do not let Him heal them because it is not the easiest road to take. It is the path of humility and self-denial that leads to healing and spiritual maturity. It is the decision to make another's well-being more important than your own, even when that person has brought you great sorrow.

 

That used to be a wild concept for me - putting others before yourself. Then I became a mom! It gets easier when you rely on the Lord for the strength you don't have.

 

Page 81: "I will not marry you. I don't care who prophesied over you or what was said. I don't care how many have said, 'You two make a lovely couple.' If God has not revealed His will in your heart, you have no business going on with this marriage."

 

I trust that he actually spent time counseling and advising this young couple, but the way he shares the story he just sounds like a jerk. Perhaps they don't know how to listen for God's will. It all worked out in the end, but reading this just made me crabby with him. 

 

Page 83: The revealed Word of God is the solid rock on which we are to build our lives and ministries.

 

I agree! 

 

Page 87: Be sure that you build your life on God's revealed Word, not what others say. Keep seeking the Lord and listening to your heart.

 

 I agree with him, but he never really shares how to do this. For new believers or people young in their faith, this can be pretty hard.

 

Page 114: In the beginning I tried to run them over with the gospel. I told them they were not saved just by attending mass. I pushed them to their limits. I was not wise. Then God instructed me to live the Christian life before them and let them see my good works. 

 

I liked his personal example of trying to witness to his Roman Catholic parents and grandparents. It can be so hard to share the gospel with people who have known you all your life! I think for many Christ-followers, how to best share the gospel is an ongoing question.

 

Page 118: Some will not understand as you move with the Spirit. Don't allow their unpleasant response to deter you from what you know in your heart is true. 

 

I love that he uses 1 Peter 4:1-2 to reinforce this idea. We can't water down our faith to appease people who don't like the gospel. Live for the will of God.

 

Page 127: Jesus proved His rights regarding the temple tax to Peter and the rest of the disciples to exemplify the importance of laying down our lives to serve. He never wanted freedom to be a license to demand our rights and cause another to stumble.

 

I love living by Jesus' example! He served, loved, and taught whoever would listen.

 

Page 128: Our liberty has been given to us for serving and laying down our lives. We are to build and not to destroy. Nor was this liberty given for us to heap things on ourselves. Because we have used it in this manner, many today are offended by the lifestyles of Christians.

 

Yes! I think back to Jim and Tammy Faye Bakker in the 1980s. What a turn-off. If following Jesus and enjoying spiritual freedom looks like that, no thank you. I think some of the Christian Nationalists today are also making huge mistakes in this regard.

 

Page 143: Forgiveness is usually denied to other people, but sometimes it it denied to oneself. . . . Anyone includes you! If God forgave you, who are you not to forgive the one He has forgiven, even if it is you?

 

I struggled with unforgiveness toward myself for a long time when I was a new Christian. That was really hard - to let go of the past and allow myself to experience God's grace, mercy, and love. (The part I omitted was Matthew 5:24. Look it up.)

 

Page 155: Many people are able to hide their offense and hatred as Absalom did.

 

Okay, I admit that I struggle with this story from 2 Samuel . . . where Amnon raped Absalom's sister Tamar, basically destroying her life. I would most definitely want to go the revenge / avenge route rather than forgiveness. I'm just being honest. I understand the point the author is making, but some of us want to see justice happen. I'm learning to trust God for the eternal outcome, but I can't be too hard on Absalom here.

 

Page 156: Perhaps David should have taken action against Amnon. Perhaps a leader has areas of error. Who is the judge - you or the Lord? Remember that if you sow strife, you will reap it.

 

I definitely know the Lord has better judgment! And I would prefer a life of peace rather than strife. These are good things to think about.

 

Page 157: Do not be afraid to allow the Holy Spirit to reveal any unforgiveness or bitterness. The longer you hide it, the stronger it will become and the harder your heart will grow. Stay tenderhearted. How?

Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you. (Ephesians 4:31-32)

 

Scripture has the answers! I remember the first time I heard the acronym for Bible: Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth. I like that. I really need to spend more time reading that rather than all these other books.

 

Page 162: This was exactly where the Lord wanted me - at the end of myself. So often we try to do things in the strength of our souls. This does not cause us to grow spiritually. Instead, we become more susceptible to falling.

 

It's interesting how much less stressful life becomes when you trust in the Lord and His strength instead of your own might. I wish I'd learned how at a much younger age!

 

Page 166: We grow in the tough times, not the easy times. Hard places will always come in our journey with the Lord. We cannot escape them but need to face them, for they are part of the process of becoming perfect in Him. If you choose to run from them, you will seriously hinder your growth.

 

This is in the section titled "Maturing Through Hardships." Been there, done that. Just kidding. Sometimes, though, I've definitely prayed, "Lord, I know you say you won't give me more than I can handle, but I think You have too much confidence in me!" Hmm . . . 1 Corinthians 10:13 is more about temptation than life "stuff," but I don't know what other verse makes sense here. Jeanne needs to spend more time in the Word!

 

Page 172: Often we judge ourselves by our intentions and everyone else by their actions.

 

Ooh! I'm guilty of this one! I know what my heart and my intentions are . . . but that isn't always communicated well to others. And sometimes instead of giving other people the "benefit of the doubt," I'm quick to judge their words and / or actions. This is definitely an area where I need to make some improvements.

 

Page 173: But when I defend myself, it only fuels their fire of offense. This is not pursuing peace. Standing up for ourselves and "our rights" will never bring true peace.

 

Again, I can definitely be guilty of wanting to "prove" my point of view / my good intentions. If someone else is upset with me, I need to listen. And pray. And ask forgiveness.

 

Page 177: If we keep the love of God as our motivation, we will not fail. Love never fails. When we love others the way Jesus loves us, we will be free even if the other person chooses not to be reconciled to us. 

 

This is good stuff! I opted not to do the study guide, but will be happy to return this book to my friend Pat tomorrow at church. 

Juneteenth

By: Ralph Ellison

Libby audiobook 14:30 hours

Read by: Joe Morton 

Published: 1999 (I think)

Genre: fiction, race

 

I checked this out because I'm trying to read "great works" and "great authors" to expand my horizons. But I honestly have not been enjoying it. So Louie convinced me to blog what I've listened to so far (5 hours, 13 minutes) and move on.

 

The introduction is by John F. Callahan, who published it after Ellison's death (and did some editing to get it ready for publication). Ellison started on it just two years after Invisible Man came out and worked on it for forty years! The introduction was quite interesting, but hearing him say "quote, unquote" over and over and over got old.

 

I own a print copy of Invisible Man (which I've not yet read) and I did some online reading to figure out what I'm missing by not listening to the next nine hours of this book . . . I think I made the right choice by stopping here. 

 

From Ebsco.com: ""Juneteenth" by Ralph Ellison is a complex narrative that delves into themes of race, identity, and historical memory through its portrayal of the relationships between its central characters. The story unfolds with Reverend Alonzo Hickman and his congregation traveling to Washington, D.C., to confront Senator Adam Sunraider, who is embroiled in race-baiting rhetoric. The congregation believes they can redeem Sunraider, who was once a member of their community as a boy named Bliss. However, the unfolding events reveal deeper layers of Sunraider's character and his manipulative agenda."

 

In chapter two, the Senator's speech made me think of 1984's doublespeak. It's almost surreal listening to it.

 

I made a note: "PEOPLE don't save souls!" Only God has this power

 

It was hard for me to decide who I disliked more - Bliss / the Senator or Reverend Hickman. Ugh. Hickman's preaching all seemed to be for his own glory, not for God. 

 

Hickman says, " . . . black boys and brown girls . . . " at one point. I thought, "why are the children two different colors - one for each gender?" I don't care enough to dig into it, but it seemed odd. 

 

I had other thoughts on this but didn't write other notes. 

 

It was fun in the intro when he said Ralph Ellison was named for Ralph Waldo Emerson . . .  

 

I do plan on reading Invisible Man at some point, but I'm going to move on to a different audiobook for sure! 

 

 

50 Children: One Ordinary American Couple's Extraordinary Rescue Mission into the Heart of Nazi Germany

By: Steven Pressman

Hennepin County Library hardcover 260 pages plus acknowledgements, notes, and index

Published: 2014

Genre: non-fiction, WWII history

 

I was curious about the true story behind our August book club title The Brunswick. It was fascinating to see how Callie Murray took a true event and wove it into such a wonderful story (The Brunswick). 

 

This was hard for me to read, though. What happened in the 1930s and 40s still horrifies me. I love that Pressman is married to the granddaughter (Liz Perle) of Gilbert and Eleanor and it was Eleanor's accounting of what they experienced that led to this book. Fascinating.

 

In early 1939, the Jewish Americans Krauses pushed to go into Nazi Germany to get fifty children out with unused US visas. It was daring and unprecedented, but they were successful.

 

Page 5: Coincidentally three prominent Philadelphia Quakers - . . . - had traveled on their own to Berlin only a few weeks earlier in an effort to help Jews get out of Germany. Quaker groups in the United States, organized under the banner of the American Friends Service Committee, had become active in a variety of Jewish rescue efforts ever since Hitler had come to power in 1933.

 

I love this! I have such "quaint" notions of Quakers, but they were clearly acting out in faith, trying to save victims of Nazi Aryanism. Very cool that there were people actively trying to help.

 

Page 16: But the Jewish spirit of social service and tikkun olam - the Hebrew phrase meaning "healing the world" - remained an integral part of life for the city's Jewish community leaders, including Solomon Kraus.

 

Solomon was Gilbert's dad. There was a lot of interesting historical info in this section. To have a phrase meaning "healing the world" is pretty neat.

 

Page 54: By the end of World War I, America had ceased to be a nation that warmly invited immigrants from around the world. Throughout the 1920s and 1930s, a virulent xenophobia pervaded the United States, and the once-idealized sympathy for those millions of "huddled masses yearning to breathe free" had long since vanished into thin air.

 

This change saddens me. It makes me even sadder that one hundred years later, the MAGA mentality cares even less about those who are disenfranchised and "foreign." I'm so glad that Jesus taught and modeled a different mentality! Lay down your life. Take care of others.Serve selflessly.

 

Page 78: As conditions in Nazi Germany deteriorated, Razovsky and others grew more frustrated than ever with the rigid limits imposed by American immigration policies. 

 

Cecila Razovsky was a Jewish American social worker and activist for immigrants in the U.S. (per Wikipedia). She was doing the same thing that the Krauses were - trying to rescue children from Nazi Germany, but she had been at it longer than them. If only . . . how many lives could have been saved if we had relaxed our quotas a bit? 

 

Page 126: "My parents did not give me this feeling that I might not ever see them again because of the tragedies that were occurring in Europe," said Paul Beller. "Instead my mother painted a very different picture. She said to me, 'How would you like to visit some of your relatives in New York and have a little vacation in America?' She presented it without any grimness or fear, even though in her own mind I'm sure she was thinking totally differently. So when I was interviewed, I presented a very positive picture. I made it sound like I wasn't afraid of leaving on my own."

 

As a parent, I can't imagine how much courage it took for parents to do this. To know that they might never see their child again, but wanting them to survive, to live a full life. It breaks my heart.

 

Page 148: "Every bit of me was sick at this terrible piece of man's inhumanity to man," she wrote. Eleanor was painfully conscious of her role in the tragic circumstances that led parents to willingly offer up their children. "To take a child from its mother seemed to be the lowest thing a human being could do. Yet it was as if we had drawn up in a lifeboat in a most turbulent sea," she wrote.

 

Her willingness to go through with this, even though she was frightened for her own safety and saddened by the reality of what these parents were doing, made her an absolutely heroic figure. At so many points, she just wanted to be home with her own children, safe from the Nazis.

 

Page 177: "The parents stood in completely orderly and quiet fashion. Their eyes were fixed on the faces of their children," she wrote. "Their mouths were smiling. But their eyes were red and strained. No one waved. It was the most heartbreaking show of dignity and bravery I had ever witnessed."

 

Eleanor finds out that the parents are not waving back to their children because "Jews were not allowed to give the Nazi salute. The parents risked being arrested if they raised their arms to wave good-bye." The cruelties and degradation of Jewish people . . . seems to have had no bounds in this era. 

 

Page 187: The name on her German passport was listed as Charlotte Sara Berg. But Sara was not her middle name. In an effort to easily identify Jews, one of Hitler's edicts required Jewish females to list Sara as a middle name if their first names were not recognizably Jewish. Males were required to use Israel as their middle name.

 

This explanation came up after Cyrus Follmer, an American vice consul, asked the little girl if she could write her name. She replied, "Ja," then burst into tears, asking if she had to write "Sara." This makes me so sad.

 

Page 193: . . . Eleanor was far less impressed with the Harding itself, which she dismissed as "old, small and hideous." She and Gil had long since become accustomed to considerably higher standards of luxury and comfort when it came to travel.

 

It was a little frustrating to me that Eleanor was so fashion / culture / wealth focused (in some ways), yet if someone were reading my private notes, they might take away an impression of me that I'd prefer not to give. She was courageous to embark upon this mission to save fifty children. She was also just a little hoity-toity for me.

 

Page 207: One by one, each of the children bit into the chocolates, which brought at least some of them to tears. "Viennese chocolate was so good," Wenkart remembered fondly. "And the Whitman's chocolates were really awful!"

 

This took me by surprise initially, but it also made me laugh. I think I've read too many stories of starving children treating a Hershey bar as the Holy Grail. But in 1939, these children were used to a very different quality of chocolate than their new American friends realized.

 

Page 211: Among those, 288 were allowed into Great Britain and 224 were admitted into France. Belgium took in 214, the Netherlands 181. For many, sadly, the reprieve proved to be temporary. Of the 937 passengers who first set out for Cuba, 254 lost their lives in the Holocaust - victims of roundups and deportations that came in the wake of the Nazi occupation of Belgium, Holland, and France.

 

This made me think of Long Way Home by Lynn Austin! (A book club title that deals with this topic that we read in October 2022.) How awful to have a visa to get into Cuba, traveling across the ocean, then having Cuba say no. . . and the United States refuse to accept you . . . and Canada . . . and having to travel back across the ocean to Europe. Oh, we can be so selfish and hard-hearted.

 

Page 214: The children's English lessons, which had begun onboard the Harding, continued throughout the summer. On the weekends, the Sunday comics provided the children with a particularly enjoyable method for mastering their new language. . . . "To this day, the funnies are the first thing I read on Sundays before reading the rest of the paper."

 

This is from one of the children, Erwin Tepper, in an interview. I agree with him! If I have a Sunday paper, the comics are first.

 

Page 251 (Afterword): Those who stood silently by were also complicit in their way, giving full reign to the perpetrators, facilitating genocide, and proving that to be a "bystander" in the presence of evil is not a neutral act.

 

I think about this a lot. I wasn't alive during this era in history. But the ICE detention centers and treatment of immigrants in our country right now distresses me. What am I doing about it? I don't want to be a silent bystander, complicit in what is being done to human beings in the name of MAGA.

 

Page 256 (Afterword): In the United States, the most common myth, embraced to explain America's failure to act more compassionately toward refugees and more forcefully in the face of mass murder, is that we did not know what Nazi German, her allies and collaborators, were doing. But the Krauses were not intelligence agents privy to classified information. They were reading the newspapers after Kristallnacht and learning of the brutality with which Jews were being treated in Vienna and across Germany. What distinguished them from others is simply that they chose not to close their eyes to what they were reading. In 1938-1939 information regarding Germany's treatment of Jews was publicly available to all Americans.

 

I've always heard that "Americans just didn't know what was going on." My parents aren't here any more to ask. In 1939, my mom was eleven / twelve years old and my dad was twelve / thirteen. I kind of hope they were just kids being kids and didn't know. But my grandparents? My maternal grandparents were of German ancestry. They were a wee bit persecuted in Minnesota during WWII. I wish I'd talked with my mom about this more and had recorded her stories.

 

The photograph section in the middle (and the photos at the start of each chapter) were wonderful. I was especially moved by the picture of Heinrich Steinberger. He's the five year old boy who was taken off the list of fifty children when he got ill. He died three years later at the Sobibor death camp. He was such a cute little boy. This book made me incredibly sad, but it was worthwhile. History unlearned repeats itself.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Every Given Day

By: Cathy Gohlke

Dakota County Library paperback 346 pages plus author's note, acknowledgments, and book club discussion questions

Published: 2026

Genre: Christian historical fiction, 1920s

 

We're meeting to discuss this in a few hours. I mostly enjoyed this book and definitely was curious to do a little bit of research on my own (about the era, the development of insulin, etc.).

 

Basic synopsis: Schoolteacher Gwen Armstrong goes to New York to help her ailing sister Marion with her two young children. Marion has TB (which is what the sisters' mother died from) and is already at a sanitarium when Gwen shows up on the doorstep. Mrs. Barrie, the housekeeper, is skeptical, and the two Bennett children don't want an aunt they've never met; they want their mother. Russell Bennett, Marion's husband, is a debonair "businessman" who is rarely home.

 

Page 2: Paradox, Pennsylvania, September 1918

 

I'm not completely sure why I "flagged" this . . . except that I'm interested in unusual-sounding place names. This isn't a real city - I checked - but a paradox is symbolic as a word.

 

Page 4: Gwen turned away, wishing she'd left the door open, a clear means of escape. Duty, guilt, the privilege of sacrificing for those less fortunate - those considered worthy. She knew every nuance, had lived her entire life caring for those who needed her. 

 

I love how the author acknowledged Gwen's struggle without her wallowing in a pity party. Sometimes when you are a giver, you give so much to others that you forget to take care of yourself. That said, the scene in her creepy principal's office was one I'm glad she escaped from unscathed! He was unconscionable, offering marriage as her "only choice" and assuring her that if she rejected him she'd never get hired as a teacher again. What a creep!

 

Page 24: Gwen was pleased when she read over Alistair's letter. His penmanship and his ability to formulate sentences and paragraphs in coherent, complete thought bespoke a solid early education.

 

Yes! It is so rewarding to encounter a young person who is literate! It's sad to me that she's meeting her nephew and niece for the first time, but she and Marion became estranged when Gwen's beau swept the vivacious and lovely Marion away. Understandable.

 

Page  32: Life might challenge or change their aspirations, keep them from becoming reality. But dreams meant hope, and hope, Gwen knew, was desperately needed when life around you, life and the people you've depended upon, were falling apart.

 

I think this is so key! Hope can indeed be a powerful motivator. Sometimes I'm afraid I'm a bit too much of a realist or even skeptic. Even though Gwen thought it likely her sister might not survive and come home, she wanted the children to keep hope alive.

 

Page 40: Employment for women came with a cost, a cost that must be carefully considered, and often involved a delicate dance and a line they dared not cross. A single woman could not risk joblessness, poverty, homelessness.

 

I'm very glad things have improved for women over the last one hundred years! I could not have the life I have now if I were a single woman. I would almost certainly still be working full time. Praise God and thank my amazing husband!

 

Page 53: Doctors, pastors, service providers of all sorts were run off their feet, serving in constant danger of contracting a disease they couldn't stop, couldn't begin to stem. They, too, were dropping like flies. Word had gone out for anyone willing to provide essential nursing care to please volunteer.

 

The Spanish flu really was a modern plague! So much sickness, contagion, and death. It helped that Bennett Place had a "quarantined" sign on the gate (because of Marion's tuberculosis). That kept people out. 

 

Page 71: She understood Marion's desire to protect them, to enjoy every precious moment with them as carefree as possible. Still, she wondered just how much time there would be to prepare them for the inevitable, and whether knowing or not knowing was the greater gift.

 

To me, this is very connected with the question of hope. If she were to tell the children about her own mother's death and what was happening with Marion, it would definitely be sad and sobering. At ages 11 and 8(?), it was nice for them to remain children. I like when Gwen and Mrs. Barrie had a heart to heart and hugged. The connection between these women was definitely good for the kids.

 

Page 89: Gwen was amazed and inspired by Marion's faith and heart for God. She didn't fully understand it or know how that had come about, except that Marion attributed it to her time alone with God in the sanatorium - patience and faith through suffering. It certainly had not been fostered in childhood. Gwen prayed out of desperation sometimes . . . 

 

 It took Gwen awhile, but her faith journey felt very authentic to me.

 

Page  109: That light rekindled a flame in Gwen she'd thought long dead. She didn't mean to acknowledge that flame, but she couldn't deny it.

 

Every time she felt drawn to Russell, I got mad! I understand that as a jilted "spinster," the attentions of her handsome, dashing brother-in-law were tempting, but . . . JUST SAY NO! I did not like him at all. He seemed so shallow, selfish, and nasty. That was the aspect of the book I liked the least.

 

Page 110: "I'd hoped, after Clara was born, that Marion would be content in that department, that things might return to the way they were. Parents in our class, in my circle of society, don't mollycoddle their children. Nursemaids, nannies, and governesses take care of those things, freeing adults to travel, to pursue their social responsibilities."

 

What a jerk! This is Russell, talking to Gwen about his disappointment in his wife.

 

In Chapter 22, there was a section about the increase of diabetes following the flu pandemic. That was one of the things I looked up. Apparently, there was a dramatic increase after Covid-19 as well. Interesting!

 

Page 168: In the meantime, Malcolm would go to church on Sunday, just as he always did, and pray to the God he loved and trusted for wisdom, for clarity, for skill in the work He'd given him to do. Daily he prayed for each of his patients by name, laying their cases before the Great Physician, seeking the restoration of mind and body that only He could give.

 

Malcolm was the lovely younger Scottish doctor who knew about some of the research being done to treat diabetic patients. And he had faith in the Lord. I liked Malcolm!

 

Page 186: He spends money as if it were wastewater. The grocery bill for this affair alone could feed a family of five for more than a year. 

 

Gwen is questioning Russell's words, motives, and lifestyle. About time! He's clearly not on the up-and-up.

 

Page 224: "She prays with me at night - is helping me learn to pray. She says believing in God is a choice we make and that I should talk to God like my best friend, but with more respect, and know that He listens - like a loving father, she said." 

 

Alistair was such a delightful character. Lots of heartbreak in his young life, but as he's learning about faith from Mrs. Barrie, he's sharing his newfound faith with Aunt Gwen.

 

Page 225: How can you think of God as a loving Father if your own father barely gives you the time of day? The thought startled Gwen. Am I thinking of Alistair and his father, or of myself, and my own father?

 

I think it is very telling that Gwen came to the realization that part of her connection to Alistair was the lack of a positive father figure.

 

Page 286: Trusting, relying on anyone else, even God, goes against everything in me. Gwen shuddered. "I can't let you go. You're all that's left to me."

 

This was so sad! A twelve-year-old boy who is accepting of his own imminent death, trusting God, while the adult who is caring for him is clinging tightly. We've been talking about truly trusting God in church a lot lately. I think it's hard for us. We like to be in control. Truly trusting God means we're willing to let go. 

 

In chapter 40, Gwen decides to do something she knows she shouldn't. She steals Mrs. Barrie's keys, goes into Russell's museum and office, and rifles through his papers. I was on edge this whole chapter.

 

Page 317: She didn't love Russell. How she'd ever thought she might, let alone marry him, she didn't know now. 

 

Finally! This imaginary romance with Russell was my least favorite part of the book. He just creeped me out.

 

Page 328 had such a beautiful section between Gwen and Malcolm. I love that he encouraged her to praise God. Always a good choice!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 Page 330: Forgive me for my arrogance, Father, for thinking I know better than You what is best for him . . . or for me. You raised Jesus from the dead to life everlasting. Nothing is too hard for You. I know You can heal him. Whether now or in Your Kingdom. I'm ready to let him go to You. I surrender him to You. I trust You.

 

This was a huge shift for Gwen. The author did a wonderful job of bringing her to this point gradually. Her prayer is heartfelt.

 

Page 334 in chapter 46 has the title. Gwen says, "Every given day!" in response to Alistair's question about every day being Thanksgiving now. I love "finding" the title in the story.

 

Page 342: "Need I remind you about miracles? They may take time, but they're always in the making. We must watch for them, expect them."

 

Alistair is writing letters to Carter in Egypt, preparing the way for going to work with him. Gwen is dubious, but he gives her this lovely reminder.

 

The story ends delightfully. There are a few surprises and other parts not surprising, but pleasant aspects. I look forward to our discussion. 

The Supremes at Earl's All-You-Can Eat

By Edward Kelsey Moore

Libby audiobook 12 hours

Read by Adenrele Ojo and Pamella D'Pella

Published: 2013 (this version also 2013)

Genre: mostly realistic fiction

 

Apparently, this has been made into a movie. I am a bit surprised at how many notes I jotted as I listened to this in the car. I finished it almost two weeks ago and liked some aspects and disliked others. I'm also surprised that it was written by a man. It's primarily told from women's point of views.

 

Odette, Clarice, and Barbara Jean were nicknamed "The Supremes" as teens in the 1960s. The three women have shared a lot of life in the decades since. 

 

Odette was my favorite. She was born in a sycamore tree, the source of her strength. She was married to James and could see and talk with ghosts, including her mama and Mrs. Roosevelt.

 

Clarice was a piece of work, always trying to control situations and people. But her husband Richmond's infidelity was legendary (as was her dad's) and her mom Beatrice kept encouraging her to just ignore it.

 

Barbara Jean was married to Lester. But NOT the Lester (Payne) who was her mother's pimp! Why on Earth would the author do this?! There are so many names you could choose. I almost went back to re-listen to all this because initially I thought she married the pimp. Lester. Different Lester. Barbara Jean's mom tried to extort four different men as baby daddies. Yuk. Barbara Jean slept in the library of her fancy house and tried to decide whether to hit the bottle (vodka) or open the Bible when she couldn't sleep. She dressed in sexy, tight clothes.

 

I wrote the word "dreams." I think this is in reference to the recurrent dreams Barbara Jean had about a river and a child, but I'm not sure.

 

Big Earl was married to Thelma. When she died (before the start of this book), Earl married Minnie. Minnie is a crackpot fortune teller. She also provides a lot of comic relief. Big Earl's and Thelma's son Little Earl and his wife Irma Mae took over the diner, while Big Earl helped out until his death. Big Earl's funeral was at one of the Baptist churches. It had the "sexiest Jesus."

 

Ray "Chick" Carlson was the "prettiest white boy" and hired by Big Earl back in the day. He and Barbara Jean fall in love as teens. A lot of the back story was revealed as the book went on. 

 

When Odette gets diagnosed with non-Hodgkins lymphoma, she tries to keep quiet about it. But as she loses weight, sleeps more, and lacks energy, she shares her determination to fight the disease. Her story was my favorite thread in the book, though all the women's lives are intertwined.

 

Clarice's cousin Veronica - ugh. As teens and worse as adults, these women can be catty. As she ropes Clarice into helping her plan her daughter Sharon's wedding, the women are trying to outdo one another regarding their daughters' weddings. (Clarice tried to make her daughter's wedding fancier than Odette's daughter's and then Veronica took it to the next level.) 

 

Clarice bugged me the most. How she put up with her cheating husband and acted like she had it all together - ugh. "Feeling bad about yourself is the entire point of going to church, Odette!" Clarice's Calvary Baptist was led by a pastor who told her it was her duty to stand with Richmond no matter what. What?! Why wasn't he telling Richmond to stop sinning?! 

 

First Baptist and Holy Family were the other women's churches. 

Lester Maxberry (Barbara Jean's husband) loved cars!

Clarice's mom Beatrice was yuk! "Suffering to earn the Lord's favor." Do these people not read their Bibles?

 

They all have their coping mechanisms. For Odette, it's food; for Clarice, playing piano; and for Barbara Jean, it has become alcohol.

 

I love Odette.Threatening to kill Richmond if he messed with Barbara Jean was extreme, but effective. And it was easy to believe she scared him out of doing something incredibly stupid. 

 

This takes place in Plainview, Indiana. I have a lot of random notes that I'm not going to write here. There was a place where the vocal work for Chick is wrong - his voice sounds exactly like Barbara Jean's. I don't think I could do it justice, but it was jarring to listen to.

 

Sometimes the cattiness and gossip bothered me.

 

Odette's mama and the afterlife . . . again, entertaining, but not very believable. The WORST DAY EVER is the day Adam is killed. Adam (Barbara Jean's son with Chick) was eight years old, walking down Wall Road to get to his grandma's house when he was hit and killed by a car. The car was almost certainly driven by racist Desmond Carlson, Chick's older brother. 

 

The ghost of Eleanor Roosevelt was pretty funny - drunken, irreverent, fascinated by sex and death.

 

Minnie Mac, the fortune teller, was also funny with Yvonne and her seven babies . . . "not this one. Try again." 

 

Overall, an interesting book. A bit weird. I don't plan to see the movie. 

 

Lessons from Cats for Surviving Fascism

By: Stewart "Brittlestar" Reynolds

Ann's copy hardcover 54 pages

Published: 2024

Genre: satirical humor

 

I like the cat humor. Some of the connections between cats and our current administration (Trump) are a bit of a stretch. But the author is clever and it's a short book. It was nice of my sister to share it with me.  

Call Me Jonathan for Short

By: Cecile Godreau, M.M.

Personal collection paperback 57 pages 

Published: 1992

Genre: children's allegory

 

I'm not sure why this was in my collection, but I decided to read it before donating it. Jonathan has an elderly neighbor named Mrs. Byrne. They become friends and work in her garden together. Her dog Penny loves his attention.

 

They talk about new life after death, comparing the garden in the spring to resurrection. Since the author is a Maryknoll nun, I think this may have been given to me by my aunt, Sister Marian, when my boys were little. I don't think I ever read it to them . . . and now I'll donate it so someone else can read it. 

Things We Cannot Keep

By: Amanda Cox

Dakota County Library paperback 316 pages plus a sneak peek of a book coming out in 2027 (which I did not read)

Published: 2026

Genre: Christian realistic fiction

 

I didn't like this as well as other books by Cox, but it was an enjoyable read. We discussed it Monday at book club and I loved hearing other people's impressions. Basic summary is that Teresa Baker ran away from a very difficult childhood at age 18 and became Tess Holcomb, restorer of clocks and watches. Most of the book deals with the tension of the past and present, keeping the old and letting go of the old. 

 

I really did like the antiques restoration aspect of the story. The tracing of the mystery pocket watch's history was also quite good. 

 

Page 29: Understanding what was wrong was one thing.

Being able to fix it was something else entirely.

 

There were so many times that lines like this could be applied to physical actualities (like fixing a watch) AND to things like relationships. She's a clever author.

 

Page  82: Even if DarLee had something to bequeath other than dysfunction and emotional baggage, Tess wouldn't want it. But if she still held on to anything of Granny's . . . 

 

I know it's not funny, but the way this was worded made me giggle. Tess's mom should not have been a mom. Sometimes we inherit a LOT but it's not of value or what we want. This line also turned out to be a little bit of foreshadowing.

 

Page 90: Why was it so hard to share the more tender parts of her past? He'd be willing to help her work at the snarled threads of her life story if she asked.

(Tess talking with Amos.)

 

Page 91: Until this moment, she hadn't fully appreciated just how generous her clients had been - to share your history was to offer up a piece of yourself. Even if she had something worth sharing, did she have the capacity to let people experience it alongside her?

 

Page 118: What if talking about her hidden past really would set her free? Telling Amos part of her story hadn't been as earth-shattering as her fear tried to convince her it would be. 

(Tess getting ready to share with Shannon.)

 

A huge part of the story was what irritated me the most. Tess was secretive about her past (as a teen and in her childhood!). Yes, I understand why she was secretive, but it got old. She spent so much time lamenting even though she had wonderful people who cared about her. Amos was her mentor. Shannon a co-worker and friend. Ugh. Finally, she told them about Elliot and her real identity.

 

I tagged a couple of pages where I was crabby on Tess' behalf. When Elliot cancelled their hotel room in Amsterdam to stay with a college friend without talking to Tess about it . . . especially when he was trying to rebuild trust with her . . . and then Sanne (the friend) hosting a big party when Tess just wanted to stay in her room and process things . . . This made me so crabby! At least there was yummy food to eat.

 

Page 170-1: "Before it came into his hands, he heard stories from other barracks, whispers about 'the courage watch.' They told him how the men who looked at it rallied their strength when they were weary because it reminded them of their faith."

 

I love how the watch represented courage and hope for so many people, passed from one person to the next. The watch's story was unraveled carefully. The speaker in this scene is Hendrik, the grandson of one of the watch's owners.

 

Page 245: Tess warmed at the kindness in his voice. Through every interaction with the families they'd encountered, Elliot proved he was no longer the careless and reckless boy from their youth.

 

Yes, Elliot proved himself over and over again, but Tess was very wary of him. I should be thankful for my childhood and the trustworthiness of my family and friends.

 

I'm trying not to spoil the story for other readers, but something on page 262 made me too frustrated with Tess / Teresa. I don't mean to discount the horrors of living in an abusive, neglectful home, but her decision to lie about an incident just bugged me. Again, there was something about this story that just didn't work for me.

 

Page 291: For so many years Tess had held tight to her anger, like a constant reminder that the only person she could truly count on was herself.

 

I loved Tess' walk on the beach! I love how Amos had spoken into her life over the years. This book had a very satisfactory ending. 

 

Shop Tails: The Animals Who Help Us Make Things Work

By: Nancy R. Hiller

personal copy, hardcover, 350 pages plus bibliography and info on a cat rescue

Published: 2021

Genre: non-fiction, memoir, pets, woodworking

 

My son and daughter-in-law gave me this book for a birthday or Christmas a few years ago. I started it but set it aside for almost a year and have finally finished it. Before I deal with all my post-it notes, here's an overview:

 

What I loved:

• stories about animals
• stories about woodworking
• beautiful color photos
• her honesty

What I didn't love:

• her messed-up relationships!
• her moving constantly and living like a gypsy
• her allowing some men to dictate her happiness 

 

For different reasons, I didn't love her cancer battle. I appreciate her strength. This book was NOT about her physical well-being. In fact, she alluded to the fact that her chemo-related challenges were not as difficult as what other people have had to deal with. For most of the book, I completely forgot that she had cancer! (Of course, I had to look her up online and found that she died from pancreatic cancer in 2022 at age 63.) 

 

Page 15: For many, my specialist's estimate of four to six months, and maybe two years, holds true. 

 

This instantly made me think of my sister-in-law Nan. When the doctors told her six months, it was as though she decided to go ahead and die in six months. And she did. I appreciate the evaluating that Hiller did - she thought about quality of life, comfort, expense, etc. She wrote very eloquently about her decision-making. Since this was at the start of the book, by the time I picked it up last week to finish reading, I had completely forgotten about this!

 

Page 18: Even after getting the port I reserved the option to cancel chemo at the last minute. I have never enjoyed interactions with the Medical Industrial Complex; I dislike being viewed as a patient, a word derived from the Latin verb for suffering, in the sense of bearing something, or having things done to one, instead of being an agent, one who does the doing.

 

This is something that resonated for me. I strongly dislike the health care system in America. I'm thankful I don't need to deal with it more than I do. I'm a tiny bit curious to dig into the meaning of "patient" myself, but not now. All of my friends who have shared about chemotherapy and its effects have talked about how awful it made them feel.

 

Page 19:  When online patient portal forms malfunction, emails to addresses on the hospital's own website go unanswered and you end up on hold nearly every time you call, trapped in a repeating loop of corporate advertisements and jingles, the claim to value patient engagement rings a little hollow.

 

Yes! I remember writing an angry letter to Fairview asking them how they can call what they do health "care" when they don't seem to care at all. It's maddening!

 

Page 22: The first time our mom caught us in this pointless killing spree she suggested we think about how the ants might feel about being deprived of their lives for no reason other than our entertainment.

 

Hiller is writing about developing empathy. Although I don't have any particular affinity for ants (and I definitely kill any that show up inside my house!), I wish more kiddos got lessons in empathy from their parents.

 

Page 31: Having lived in England for 16 years, I've experienced the realities of a nationalized healthcare system. No system is without its drawbacks, but I would take nationalized health care any day over the administration-heavy, bottom-line focused system we currently have in the U.S. . . . 

 

Again, I agree with her. This is beautifully said. Of course a nationalized system isn't Utopian. But it's better than what we have in the United States (super expensive and hard to get good care without spending a fortune - all while health care and pharmaceutical executives are making money hand over fist).

 

Page 35: In part, I realized, it was because I was raised not to want, but to be grateful for what already was.

 

There's a lot you can say about being content with what you have and having an attitude of gratitude. I think we get in trouble when we use absolutes. Wanting something (material object, travel, relationship) isn't inherently bad. She goes on.

 

Page 36: But you can't really predict what a kid will do with the Buddha's First and Second Noble Truths, which in a nutshell, see all life as suffering, and suffering as a product of selfish desire.

 

Interesting. I contrast that concept with God's Word in John 16:33. Jesus said, "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." One of my daughters-in-law is exploring Buddhism. I should ask her about the Noble Truths and why this faith system appeals to her.

 

Page 39: I was dangerously dependent on outside forces, people who expressed their opposition, no less than their approval.

 

When we let others determine our identity and self-worth, it will be troubling.

 

Page 87: Just being in her presence was a joy - she paid attention to us and seemed to appreciate us as people, and she always smelled like her perfume, Yves Saint Laurent Rive Gauche. What's more, she had a slightly naughty sense of fun.

 

Hiller is talking about her grandmother Esse and visits with her when she lived in London. I want to be a delightful grandma who loves her grandchildren and leaves them with joyful memories.

 

Page 89: I had to pee when I got off the train, but I didn't want to spend the penny to go to the station loo. I decided to wait until I got home.

 

This didn't end well . . . and sadly, I can relate. I've always joked about my "micro-bladder" and peeing a lot. But it's not funny. Birthing three ginormous babies, drinking too much coffee, and aging have made this situation even more relatable. (Though I rarely try to "hold it." I find bathrooms quickly everywhere I go.)

 

Page 130: Bad things happened everywhere.

 

I decided not to include the story of the chapter, with the vulture she tried to rescue and the idea that we didn't have Facebook in the 70s and 80s to let people know we're okay. Just this statement. Yes, bad things happen everywhere. I remember vividly when Jacob Wetterling was abducted. Small town Minnesota. Riding his bike in the day. It was shocking.

 

Page 156: "If you get a dog, I'm out of here," Flynn said. I had a hard time taking him at his word. How could he be so adamant? Dogs are great companions. And puppies are irresistibly cute. Surely if I came home with one, he'd relent.

 

This bothers me on multiple levels, but if you disregard what your partner is saying and do what you want anyhow, you're the jerk. (And yes, I've been the jerk in the past. It's something I try to avoid.) No wonder so many of her relationships didn't work out.

 

Page 172: I winced in the living room, deeply conflicted about the harsh punishment while knowing I'd done William a disservice by failing to give him the kind of training he should have had, and sorry about the injury to Alan's hand.

 

This whole page drove me crazy! I even wrote in the margin. Her partner at the time BEAT the dog William with a 2x4!!! She goes on to say, "Alan was a good man . . . " Sigh. I'm getting mad again just looking at this page.

 

Page 173: Like William, I'm not much of a quitter, at least unless I'm thoroughly convinced that leaving is the right decision. So I doubled down on my efforts to bear the way things were and stayed.

 

Staying in a horrible situation with someone who would beat a dog with a piece of lumber . . . I can't imagine making that choice. It makes me think of what I've read about domestic violence and how abused women struggle to leave. Hiller did eventually leave.

 

Page  175: Already twice-divorced, I had been told repeatedly that I was joyless and unlovable. I was in my mid-40s, an age at which a vast corpus of popular publications assured me I was unlikely to marry again or even have another long-term relationship. I wanted a partner; there was so much in life to share - not just sex, but good food, fires in the woodstove, gardening, walks, books and movies, other friends - and I have always loved the basic mammalian comfort of sleeping next to someone I love and trust.

 

While I share her affinity for having a partner, her many partners frustrated me. Don't be so quick to connect with someone if you aren't confident that you are true partners.

 

Page 184: This would be the last time I betrayed an animal friend because of a man. 

 

It took her long enough! This was still Alan . . . who actively sabotaged the things she loved (like tearing up her carefully tended sunflowers and leaving them to wilt and die). 

 

Page  196: As I thought about that experience over subsequent years, I came to see "things versus people" as a dichotomy that's false and destructive. You can't even have things without people; we're interdependent.

 

She goes on to talk about makers - both craftspeople and factory workers. "Material artifacts are also repositories of memory." This section was wonderful for me to read because I've really been struggling with having too much stuff and wanting to get rid of excess. Although I value people more than things, I spend lots of time dealing with things.

 

Page 211: That summer, Mark asked if I'd like to move in with him and Jonas.

 

As soon as I read this I thought, "Oh no! Not another one!" But Mark was a keeper, a truly good guy.

 

Page 229: Over his 12-1/2 years Louis met many dogs and performed sophisticated psychological operations on them all. He'd crouch beneath a truck or around a corner, then leap out with a startling cry. He ignored any dog that wanted to play, walking past with regal nonchalance, then surreptitiously batting at the poor sap's leg or tail to get its attention. When the dog perked up - Oh! You want to play? - Louis's eyes glazed over and he moved on. 

 

That's such a cat thing to do! I love how she wrote this. Most chapters were titled by the main animal(s) in her life at the time.  Binky, Oscar, Winnie, Lucy . . . When I was reading chapter 18, I had to go back to see what the heading was. "Missing in Action." Heart-breaking.

 

Page 254: Henny, though, was something else. Alarmed by the viciousness of the attack, I thought she was the one who should be euthanized. Mark was adamantly opposed.

 

This section was scary to read. To have a dog that could fly into a fury and cause damage to other animals or people? Scary. It reminded me of my son's dog Otto. Otto could be so incredibly sweet and well-behaved, but could switch to insane attack at a moment's notice. I called it doing a "Jeckyll / Hyde."  

 

Without completely spoiling the book for another reader (STOP HERE IF YOU DON'T WANT SPOILERS!), chapter 18 is about her coming home to find her stepson, Jonas, dead. Pages 301-305 are especially harrowing. This scenario could happen to any of us. It turns out he had been trying the "choking" fad and was conducting a scientific experiment. He didn't commit suicide; he miscalculated the way his body would go when he passed out. Heart-breaking. Desiring an altered state of consciousness - alcohol, drugs, sniffing, choking . . . they're all dangerous.

 

Page 307: But at home he would spend hours by the fire, writing in his journal, reading poetry and weeping.

 

Mark's grief was deep and real. Losing a child changes your existence - I've observed that in others. I don't want to experience it ever!

 

Page 307: I get the concept of toxic positivity, but what I did next doesn't qualify. Mark needed a good shaking-up.

 

I've certainly been guilty of "toxic positivity," but I'm trying to be more sensitive to where others are at and what they need most.

 

Page 307: Sometimes a simple shift in perspective is capable of altering the world; it doesn't erase the damage or the pain, and it certainly can't prevent death, but it can offer a kind of freedom - the freedom to see opportunity amid loss and hardship. While a shift in perspective is no substitute for action to minimize avoidable risks, right injustice and address the world's sometimes-overwhelming ills, it strikes me as a critical component in any kind of healing.

 

Yes, considering your perspective and your options is freeing.

 

Page 314: When you think about it, it's a miracle that anyone reaches adulthood. Tragedy can strike any family. Why don't we, as a culture, talk about this more?

 

If I hazarded a guess, it would be that most people avoid talking about unpleasant topics. And tragedies are unpleasant.

 

Page 330: No, I conclude: it seems indisputably better to have the chance to face seemingly unbearable loss alongside those we love. This, too, is related to a sense of agency: Anything can happen. We have only so much control over events themselves, but we can usually control how we respond.

 

This is so true - we cannot control what happens to us, but we can control how we respond.  

 

I appreciate Hiller's honesty in sharing her stories. She loved many pets and people and made beautiful wood furniture. She wrote books and articles.  

The Tattooist of Auschwitz

By: Heather Morris

Libby audiobook 7 hours

Read by:  Richard Armitage

Published: 2017 (this version 2018)

Genre: historical fiction, WWII

 

This was both horrific and beautiful. Any book dealing with WWII and the Holocaust will naturally examine some of the most awful human behavior throughout history. It's hard to listen to the things that Mengele and the Nazis did to other human beings. That said, this book is very well-written.

 

Since I was listening while I drove, I made very few notes. Apparently, this book has been made into a series . . . like television? This book was written based on interviews with Ludwig (Lale) Sokolov. It was weird to have it be a love story because of the setting, but it's kind of nice that he found love and it sustained him.

 

Listening to it, I thought Lale sounded like "Lah - lay" and Tätowierer (German word for tattooist) sounded like "Tatt - oh - vee - air - ay."  Armitage's vocal work was excellent - German, French, distinguishing between different characters . . . just stellar.

 

Aaron pulling him off the death cart! And then being disappeared. Victor and Yuri and the smuggling ring. French Tätowierer selecting him, then Lale choosing Leon. So many horrible, cruel things. 

 

One thing that stood out for me was when Lale talked about valuing books and the German guard dismissing books and reading as pointless and unnecessary. It made me think of our current POTUS and his disdain for books and learning.  

 

In some ways, the story seemed too good to be true. Lale managed to get out of "hopeless" situations. He and his sweetheart both survived the camps. I'm glad I read this, but some people object to how certain situations and places were described. For me, the idea that human beings can do such evil is a cautionary tale. And I do like a happy ending.

The Unselected Journals of Emma M. Lion, Volume 2

By: Beth Brower

Libby audiobook  5 hours

Read by: Genevieve Gaunt 

Published: 2019 (this version 2025)

Genre: historical fiction

 

I love this series so much! Each volume is short. I've listened to it and have a print version on hold at the library. The narrator does a lovely job, but I just want to pore over the words. I may write a fan letter to the author!

 

In this one, Emma establishes a communication and even friendship with "the renter." She makes what I think of as a "deal with the devil" in agreeing to trade favors with the duplicitous Jack. They make a daring rescue of Jane Eyre from the school Emma went to. 

 

Just a delightful story and I'll add to this entry after I read the print version. 

 

Lolita

By: Vladimir Nabokov

With an introduction by Claire Messud 

Libby ebook  Part One (33 chapters), Part Two (36 chapters), "Vladimir Nabokov on a Book Entitled Lolita," Author Bio, and Reading Group Guide

Published: 1955 (this edition / intro 2025)

Genre: fiction

 

I only got to chapter five in the first part before I decided I didn't want to read this book. I try to read at least one "classic" work of literature each year, to broaden my horizons. I had some vague notions about this book based on references to it (especially the Police song sung by Sting - Don't Stand So Close to Me - which references "that book by Nabokov").

 

If you're curious about the book, just read the Wikipedia page about it. I'm glad to have a bookmark in my brain for the name Humbert Humbert, but I'll find a different book to spend my time reading.

 

Introduction: The real world around us, seventy years after Lolita's publication, unsettlingly resembles that of Humbert Humbert's account, one in which men are psychotically obsessed with women (or girls, in his case), whose human reality is all but obliterated by their projected fantasy.

 

This creeped me out and immediately brought to mind the Epstein files and the many, many men who lived out their sexual fantasies with underage girls. Nasty. Not fiction.

 

Foreword: Viewed simply as a novel, "Lolita" deals with situations and emotions that would remain exasperatingly vague to the reader had their expression been etiolated by means of platitudinous evasions.

 

From Wikipedia: "The novel is prefaced by a fictitious foreword by John Ray Jr., an editor of psychology books. Ray states that he is presenting a memoir written by a man using the pseudonym "Humbert Humbert", who had recently died of heart disease while in jail awaiting trial for an unspecified crime" So . . . Nabokov wrote the foreword as though a psychology book editor wrote it. Weird. 

 

Chapter 3: . . . . and four months later she died of typhus in Corfu.

 

Holy cow! He's talking about a young love for Annabel and is describing a scene at the beach. This comment comes at the end of a sentence and chapter.   

 

Chapter 5: . . . and soon I found myself maturing amid a civilization which allows a man of twenty-five to court a girl of sixteen but not a girl of twelve.

 

Um . . . yeah. Because that's just creepy. At this point, I went to wikipedia and read the summary of the story. I am not interested in trying to understand this book from an academic point of view and I certainly don't want to read it for "pleasure." So I figured I'd blog this much, return it, and move on. His discussion of "nymphettes" was just too much for me.

Glucose Revolution: The life-changing power of balancing your blood sugar

By: Jessie Inchauspé

Scott County Library hardcover 224 pages plus acknowledgements, notes, and index

Published: 2022

Genre: non-fiction, nutrition

 

This book was recommended to me by an alternative-health person I met this summer. My blood sugar numbers have been creeping up and I do NOT want to have another medication to take, so I decided to read this. The cover also has the blurb "Lose weight, stop cravings, get your energy back, and still eat what you love."

 

I know myself well enough to know that I am not ready to radically change my eating habits. I do, however, want to make healthier choices and avoid being prescribed more medications than I'm already taking. So here are the "takeaways" from this book. (The author wore a glucose monitor and wrote a lot about glucose "spikes" and how our body deals with them. It's worth reading and thinking about.)

 

Page 16: Starch, fiber, fructose, and sucrose - the various forms glucose can take - exist thanks to photosynthesis. 

 

I'm not sure why I marked this, but thinking about food in terms of these "types" and knowing how our bodies process, store, and burn glucose was interesting.

 

Hack 1 - Eat Foods in the Right Order  

 

Page  73: What is the right order? It's fiber first, protein and fat second, starches and sugars last.

 

This is something I'm trying to start. When it's reasonable, I'm getting veggies into me, then protein, then other stuff. Work in progress. A few times, I've done celery with peanut butter before eating my meal.

 

Hack 2 - Add a Green Starter to All Your Meals

 

This . . . just won't happen. ALL my meals? Again, when reasonable, I'll have a green veggie before the rest of my meal. (Salad first is how I grew up, but only at some dinner meals.) 

 

Hack 3 - Stop Counting Calories

 

Page 104: In any case, calories measure heat generated, nothing else.

Page 104: One hundred calories of fructose, 100 calories of glucose, 100 calories of protein, and 100 calories of fat may release the same amount of heat when they burn, but they have vastly different effects on your body. Why? Because they are different molecules.

 

This section made me think of the Eat This, Not That books. It makes a lot of sense that calories only aren't as important as how your body uses what you eat. I remember when I started tracking my food in 2016 - would I rather have a sugar cookie at work or consume those calories in a glass of red wine that evening? Making conscious choices about what to eat is helpful.

 

Hack 4 - Flatten Your Breakfast Curve

 

Page 123: Eating takes longer than drinking. Second, in a whole piece of fruit, sugar is always accompanied by fiber. As I explained earlier, fiber significantly reduces the spike caused by any sugar we eat.

 

Page 123: The more denatured a fruit is, the worse it is for us. An apple is better for us than applesauce, which is better for us than apple juice. Essentially, as soon as it's juiced, dried, candied, canned, or turned to jam, you should think of fruit as dessert, just as you would a slice of cake.

 

Although I completely understand what she's saying here, I think for those of us who easily tend toward unhealthy eating habits, even fruit juice or dried fruit is preferable to a candy bar or doughnut. I love that she advocates for a savory breakfast. I much prefer bacon and eggs to pancakes or cereal!

 

Page 133: A good rule of thumb for a smoothie: don't put more fruit into the blender than you could eat whole in one sitting.

 

Hack 5 - Have Any Type of Sugar You Like - They're All the Same

 

Page 147: . . . remember, sweetness activates the addiction center in our brain. The more we eat it, the more we want it.

 

I didn't used to be a "sweet tooth" person, but I find myself eating more candy and sweet treats the last few years than I used to . . . and I'd like to change that.  

 

Hack 6 - Pick Dessert Over a Sweet Snack

 

I think she talked about saving that sweet snack for after your next meal. Eat it as a dessert instead of snacking on it between meals. 

 

Hack 7 - Reach for Vinegar Before You Eat

 

Page 159: What researchers found was that by adding vinegar before meals for three months, the subjects lost two to four pounds and reduced their visceral fat, waist and hip measurements, and triglyceride levels.

 

I'm not a big fan of vinegar, but I think this is one hack I will try. Once a day instead of every meal, but a tablespoon of apple cider vinegar in a big glass of water is worth trying.

 

Page 166: You shouldn't experience any negative side effects as long as you stick to drinkable vinegar - i.e., vinegar with 5 percent acidity (cleaning vinegar has 6 percent acidity, so if it's next to the mops and toilet paper at the supermarket, don't drink it!).

 

I didn't even think about the variability of acidity in different vinegars! Now I want to check and see what I have in my house.

 

Hack 8 - After You Eat, Move

 

Sometimes I'm good about this and other times (too often) I just sit on the sofa.  Going for a walk is much better for my body. This is a habit I could definitely work on.

 

Hack 9 - If You Have to Snack, Go Savory 

 

Again, I like savory, so this is good! I'm just going to throw a pic from page 186 here for ideas.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hack 10 - Put Some Clothes on Your Carbs

 

This was about eating "on the go." So if you're having a brownie, ask for some Greek yogurt on it. Or add nuts to your cookie dough. She had a lot of ideas, but I don't think anything really inspired me here. Or maybe I was just already thinking about doing some of the earlier hacks.

 

Cheat Sheets - How to Be a Glucose Goddess When Things Get Hard 

 

She has an instagram account called the Glucose Goddess. She shared some people's testimonials about how her hacks have helped them. This book is worth reading if you're curious, like me. And / or your blood sugar is of concern. She's careful to say that you should consult with your doctor if you have diabetes and are taking insulin. It's well-written and I want to try some of these things. Basically, I am starting with eating more veggies. (A trip to the Farmer's Market was a good thing for me to do last Saturday.) 

 

 

The September Society

By: Charles Finch

Libby audiobook 

Read by: James Langton

Published: 2008 (this version 2011)

Genre: historical murder mystery

Charles Lenox Mystery #2 

 

Right from the get-go I did not enjoy this book as much as the first one. The story opens with British soldiers in India and a reference to the "darkies." I know that it's historically accurate, but Lysander and Juniper and their actions are darker spiritually than the people they're denigrating. Then, too, the story made me think immediately of Sherlock Holmes and the Sign of Four. 

 

My random notes include:

• Most of the story is just traveling back and forth from London to Oxford. Why?! 
• Who are all these people?! Dabney, Goodson, . . . I wasn't listening that well . . .  
• McConnell & Toto marriage troubles . . . baby does not necessarily equal happiness! 
• Dithering over asking Jane to marry him! Just ask her! 
• ballistics - history? 

 

It was an interesting murder mystery but much too convoluted for me. I'm not going to request book #3 at this point . . . but I may continue on in the series later. 

Remarkably Bright Creatures

By: Shelby Van Pelt

Libby audiobook 11 hours

Read by:  Marin Ireland and Michael Urie

Published: 2022

Genre: mostly realistic fiction

 

What an engaging story! I loved Tova, the strong-though-tiny widow who cleans at the aquarium. I really liked the octopus Marcellus (and the vocal work of Urie) even though he came across as supercilious at times. Cameron was a bit too much of a deadbeat for me . . . though he got better as the story went on.

 

I was surprised to see that it's being made into a movie . . . and also that this is Van Pelt's debut novel. It was interesting to think about Tova's life - her Swedish father building the house she lived in, her husband's illness and death, the loss of their son Eric at age 18 . . . the author did a nice job making connections throughout the book.

 

For some reason, I really liked the Grateful Dead t-shirt part of the book. I really disliked Tova's "KnitWit" girlfriends, especially Barb. I wish the author had described some aspects of the characters lives in more depth. Aunt Jean was quirky, to say the least. And Ethan's back story seemed slim. But overall, a very delightful book. Marcellus' chapters really enhanced the story. 

 

I found a scrap of paper after I posted this six days ago. Nothing big, but I wanted to note that Cameron's band was "Moth Sausage," and I loved that Ethan found a shirt with their logo. Early on, I had noted "loser" by Cameron's name. I just didn't like him even though his bio mom had dumped him on her sister, his Aunt Jean. It's hard to have empathy for someone who is a lazy slob with a "poor me" attitude. Tova, on the other hand, was amazing. Interesting how things turn around. 

The Brunswick

By: Callie Murray

Dakota County library paperback 340 pages plus author's note and acknowledgements

Published: 2026

Genre: Christian historical fiction, WWII

 

I didn't make it to the book club discussion last night but I really enjoyed this book. Set in Norcross, Georgia in 1939 and Austria (same time), this first-time novelist really crafted an engaging story. Cora is the protagonist who grew up at the Brunswick, a fancy hotel built by her father after he returned from WWI with his French bride. Alas, Cora's mother left and her father fell into a deep depression. Cora struggles to keep the hotel afloat in the aftermath of the Great Depression.

 

Page 72: What would life look like if her mother hadn't left them? If the financial crash hadn't happened? If her father hadn't served in the war?

She could write a thousand different stories, but the truth was they were living just this one.

 

I flagged this passage because I think most people have had times where they've asked the "what if" questions. It can be interesting to think of how life might have turned out differently, but it isn't productive. Looking ahead at options and choices will be more fruitful than looking back.

 

Page 87: Adults hid their expressions like a secret, while children shared theirs so freely, like little gifts.

 

This made me chuckle, because I tend to show my thoughts and feelings quite freely (like a little child) even though I'm sixty! I've always called it NOT having a good poker face.

 

Page 107: "New York strips for all of us. Medium."

 

This was an odd thing for me to flag, but I strongly dislike the idea of anyone ordering other people's food at a restaurant without consulting them! It really makes me crabby! Granted, Billie as a character was dramatic and  forthright, but she just made me mad with this comment at a restaurant while out with best friend Cora and their beaus.

 

Page 124: "Opening the hotel to the children is the right thing to do, so I'm going to do it," she said with fresh resolve. "And I'm going to trust that it's like you say, Evelyn. Surely my father will understand."

 

Cora and her father did not communicate. For her to make major decisions (like opening the Brunswick to dozens of German Jewish children) without even trying to talk with him about it seemed risky. I kept waiting for him to go completely off the deep end. Her blithe attitude belied an undercurrent of tremendous concern.

 

Page 172:  Billie's jaw dropped and Cora clarified, "Not that exciting."

 

I'm not going to explain the entire conversational context here, but this was a lovely scene between best friends as Billie has just experienced her honeymoon night and Cora and Thomas are starting a romance.

 

Page 206: Cora and Thomas had both learned that if life was just a pursuit of happiness, they were destined to profound disappointment. 

But if life were about love, they could find victory, even in the worst of times.

Even grief was a testament to love.

 

This is really key for me. I want to be a faithful Christ follower and not just pursue my own desires. So many people seem to make decisions based purely on their own personal happiness / wants. That isn't fulfilling. I want to live for eternity while still enjoying the blessings of the here and now. (I can hear Louie saying, "You want it all, Jeanne.") God's still working on me!

 

Page 214: It was one thing to wrestle with fear yourself. It was much harder to wrestle the fears of another.

 

It's interesting that such an observation would come from Charlotte, a child. But some children are quite perceptive. She wants to alleviate her parents' worries and the other children's worries . . . but cannot.

 

Page 232: Nobody understands what one is experiencing, she agreed. Sometimes least of all the one experiencing it.

 

This reminds me of the importance of empathy. I may not really know or understand what you're going through, but I care about you and I see your struggle. In this scene, they're waiting for the children to get off the train. Cora wonders what the children are feeling as they come to a safe place but without their parents, and in a strange world with a different language.

 

Page 234: "Worry is a waste of the time we have left."

 

John (the father of Dean, Thomas, and Anders) says this to Cora. He has seen his wife sicken and die from ALS. He has been ostracized because of his German heritage. He has seen troubles befall his sons. But he shares this wisdom with Cora. Scripture says a lot about not worrying!

 

Page 251: It seemed that joy and sorrow weren't on opposite ends of a pole as she once thought. Instead, they felt like circles that often intersected.

 

Cora was a wonderful protagonist with strengths and flaws. I really like this observation. I, too, can laugh and cry in a short span of time.

 

Page 279: He pulled up a watermelon deep from the dirt and . . . 

 

What?! Watermelons don't grow "deep" in the dirt! This stopped me short. A watermelon isn't a carrot.

 

Page 286: . . . John had experienced so much heartache, yet, unlike her own father, he hadn't succumbed to it. Even in the midst of the current hardships, he seemed to be coming back to life again, sprouting after a long winter.

 

Cora's observations about John and her own father don't leave her bitter. She is wondering about the difference and marveling at John's recovery from deep grief.

 

Page 289: "Look, people will always fear what they don't know. The only remedy I've found is just to get to know the unknown."

 

I love Meredith! True salt of the earth, that woman. She certainly takes life in stride.

 

Page 296: Peace emanated from her, filled the room.

How did she manage?

Hope. He heard the word as if it were whispered.

 

When Thomas is being interrogated by the Nazis, he thinks back to his mother as she was suffering and dying. Her example gave him strength.

 

Page 299: She had never understood his patterns - awake all evening, asleep all day. But now for the first time, she could understand how one's mind could work at a different pace as one's body, how they could depend on each other so fully yet let each other down all the same.

 

I like this both for Cora gaining a better understanding of her father and for the concept that our minds and bodies don't always cooperate with one another! It can be maddening to be exhausted and need sleep, but to have your mind running around keeping you awake.

 

Page 307: What could victory even look like in this broken paradigm? Thomas and these children were now free of the Nazis' threat, but the emotional war was just beginning. Fear had given way to guilt and grief, tempered only by the occasional rush of thankfulness, of joy.

Cora watched Ben's face as he felt the blow of each of these, a crushing wave one after another.

Grief and gratitude, like the tides.

 

Freedom is a powerful thing. To be free in your mind and soul isn't the same as being physically free in your body.

 

Page 325: Time had been Cora's enemy, a relentless force that was always far too fast or too slow. 

 

Cora is learning to live in the moment. But this idea that time in an enemy is interesting . . . time is just time. But when "time flies when you're having fun" and it seems to crawl when you want to move on. . . . time can seem to be an entity unto itself. 

 

Page 329: "Dignity's like a lightning rod, it seems."

 

Thomas has "woken" Cora's dad from his stupor. I'm not sure this is a very realistic scenario for someone who's been sunk in a depressive stupor for years, but this comment has some truth to it. As a woman, I need to be more cognizant of how men view "help" from women. It's too easy to have an emasculating effect on men when you are a strong, determined woman.

In her author's note, Murray wrote several things that caught my attention. This novel was partially based upon the real-life story of Eleanor and Gilbert Kraus as told in their granddaughter Liz Perle's book and film 50 Children: The Rescue Mission of Mr. and Mrs. Kraus. I really want to see this! I've requested the book from the library. It appears that the documentary can be watched on YouTube.

 

The author also wrote about how elements of Cora's life paralleled her own. She also struggled with weakness in her hands and tremors, feared ALS, and found that a stomach infection had caused a malabsorption of nutrients. "So much of what we felt we had lost was returned to us, but that experience was intensely formative. 'Open hands' became our mantra." The image of open hands, ready to receive, was a beautiful part of this book.

 

This woman is so amazing! I love how she wove so many different elements into this story without it becoming cluttered or overdone. I really wish I'd been at book club last night. And I hope Murray writes more books! 

 

 

Why Men Hate Going to Church

By: David Murrow

personal paperback 223 pages plus notes

Published: 2011 ("completely revised & updated" from 2005)

Genre: non-fiction, theology, Christianity, church

 

I'm not sure when, why, or how I got this book, but I was interested enough to keep reading it before donating it. Theology isn't my thing, yet I love to learn and be challenged in my thinking. (Okay, I don't *love* being challenged in my thinking, yet I also don't want to retreat to being in an echo chamber of only consuming those ideas that confirm my existing ideas.)

 

I am definitely not the target audience for this book (pastors are), but it was written in a very accessible manner. Raised by a feminist mother, some of his writing was extremely off-putting for me but I do understand the points he's making.

 

Page 71: During the late 1960s, young hippies began turning to Jesus. They went to church but found the music to be a real bummer. Old-fashioned hymns didn't connect with kids who had grown up listening to the Rolling Stones, Creedence Clearwater, the Beatles, and Janis Joplin.

 

Although I was just a little kid when this was going on, it immediately made me think of my sister Ann going to the Jesus People Church in the 1970s. His history lesson is fascinating. I didn't realize that Amy Grant was a big breakthrough artist for Christian music. I just remember liking her music.

 

Page 90: But the average man lacks the churchgoing skills that come naturally to many women.

I'm not talking about spirituality. I'm referring to the mundane, practical abilities that allow a person to function at a high level in a gathering of Christians. Women are just better at "doing church" than men are, because the rules of church favor women.

 

He talks about listening, sociability, verbal fluency, etc. It's interesting. He's careful to make clear that not all women have these strengths nor do all men lack them. In general, modern churches are more geared to women than men. 

 

Page 116:  And boys must have a chance to win - or they become discouraged and quit.

"Win" in Sunday school? You didn't realize it was a competition, did you?

With guys, everything is a competition. And here's the kicker: generally, men will only compete at things they're somewhat good at. If they have no chance of winning, they simply don't play.

 

Human nature . . . we need to think about these things. What's the goal? 

 

Page 120: And thanks to the way we portray Jesus in Sunday school, Christ has become a childish thing. 

 

He talks about the difference between boys and girls and how Jesus is "marketed" in Sunday school curriculum. When boys become teens, they reject the "softness" of Jesus. Again, interesting. A lot of this made me miss the Royal Rangers program at our church. It was wonderful to have godly men teaching boys to be strong followers of Jesus doing "manly" things.

 

Page 127: Together these efforts came to be known as the Muscular Christianity movement.

 

Another history lesson here. He is referring to the 1800s when George Williams started the YMCA. He writes that "Muscular Christianity was a direct assault on Puritan notions of piety." I like that he adds context for his observations and comments.

 

Page 129: And today, with only six hundred thousand members, the Salvation Army sponsors missions in one hundred nations and helps more needy people than every other denomination combined.

 

Wow. That's an amazing statistic (if it's true . . . for over a decade ago). It makes me think of some people's dislike of the Salvation Army because of their not supporting LGBTQ people. I cannot throw stones because I don't do nearly enough myself to help people . . . I ring a bell at a kettle each year because I know it helps raise more money to help more people.

 

Page 135: On its face, this strategy sounds radical (or sexist). But Christ did the same thing. He did not recruit a diverse group of men, women, and children. Instead, he focused like a laser on a homogenous group of twelve guys. Men like Simon Peter became the "rock" upon which he built his church. Diversity and increase came later.

 

Looking to Jesus' example makes a lot of sense. I'm too quick to look at situations through my own lens - sixty year old Minnesota woman in 2026 - and sometimes I need to work to look at other perspectives. And I most definitely need to look at what Jesus said and did. God's wisdom doesn't just dwarf my understanding; it eclipses it! (Actually, those two things are so completely different that they can't really be compared at all.)

 

Page  160: Men give up their weekends to come to church. You'd better tell them why they came. Don't be afraid to ask something great of them. Give the men a specific assignment for the week.

 

The author offers three suggestions for involving men in lessons. Teach by personal experience, stir the pot in discussions, and issue a clear call to action. He shares a conversation between Abraham Lincoln and a companion after a sermon. After Lincoln praises it as "brilliantly conceived, relevant, and well presented," his companion declares it as a great sermon. Lincoln replied that it was not great because Dr. Gurley had not asked anything of them. Whether true or not, this story is a good illustration of sermons needing to challenge us not just entertain or inform us.

 

Page 165: When Christ called disciples, he did not say, "Come, have a personal relationship with me." No, he simply said, "Follow me." Hear the difference? Follow me suggests a mission. A goal. But a personal relationship with Jesus suggest we're heading to Starbucks for some couple time.

 

He makes this point quite a few times. I've sometimes wondered about the romantic-sounding language of some worship songs. How does it feel for guys to sing them about another guy? He goes with a favorite movie analogy - his wife's is a romance; his is action adventure.

 

Page 166: The gospel is the story of a courageous man who is out to save the world against impossible odds. And he is recruiting agents to join him. He is calling you to risk everything to come under his command. And when the mission is over, a precious reward awaits. That's the message men crave.

 

Again, the author is careful with painting such a broad brush over gender differences and individuals. But a lot of what he's writing makes sense. This would be an interesting discussion book for a church group. 

 

Page 197: Nothing in Scripture suggests that long prayers are better than short ones. The Bible recommends consistency and frequency, not length.

 

Prayer! Such a vital part of life. And again, following Jesus' example is better than coming up with our own ideas of how to do things.

 

Page  202: Herb Reese of New Commandment Men's Ministries takes a group of four men and places a widow or single mother under their care. Once a month the men do handyman projects around her house, work on her car, help her balance her checkbook, whatever she needs.

 

I love stuff like this! Herb says, "For a lot of men, this is the first time they really understand the love of Christ. It's practical love. It's something guys can talk about on Monday morning with their coworkers." Such a cool ministry! To the women who need some help and to the men who get the chance to serve. Love it! (Though there's no way I want some other person balancing my checkbook. Come on, girl! Do the math.) This is in a section about how to minister to men. The topics are: give men opportunities to use their skills and gifts, give men a path to walk or a ladder to climb, give men external focus, give men big projects that capture their imaginations, give men adventure, deploy men in servant evangelism, don't keep what your church is doing a secret, charge men money, offer personal invitations to church, recognize the importance of entry and exit points, and make sure that they're also being discipled.

 

Page 213: Women bond face-to-face, whereas men bond side by side. Masculine friendships form while guys are doing something else. Like trying to beat each other to the hoop. Or fishing. Or working on cars. 

 

This made me think of one of the teacher training scenarios I had about dealing with difficult students. Work side by side with them rather than facing them. It's easier for students who are struggling (or have a hard time with authority figures) to communicate side by side. Good to remember!

 

Page 220: There seem to be fewer "Jesus is my boyfriend" songs being sung in church these days.

 

This made me giggle, but I understand what he's saying. Again, this book was written in 2005 and revised in 2011, so it's kind of old. But some of his points make perfect sense. 

 

Page 221: The changes at Grace Methodist were immediate. First, Jenn adjusted her language. "As I write liturgy and prayers and sermons, I'm thinking, How would a guy like a bricklayer, a farmer, a mechanic, or a line worker hear this?" She began using more masculine metaphors and illustrations that males could relate to.

 

This example at the end of the book heartened me. Earlier in the book, he basically said that there shouldn't be women pastors. But then he writes about Rev. Dr. Jennifer Wilson and her experience at her church in LaSalle, Illinois. Very cool way to end the book. 

 

I'm ready to donate this, but I'd love to find someone for whom this is the right book at the right time . . .