My Heartbeat

by Garret Freymann-Weyr
PRMS, hardcover, 154 pages

A sixth grader returned this, saying she didn't think it was an appropriate book. Noticing the Michael Printz award sticker on the front, I knew that I would have steered her to something else had I been working with her during checkout time. I took it home and read it. It will stay in this collection, but is definitely intended for a more mature reader.

Ellen is a 14-year-old who doesn't socialize well with her peers. Starting in prep school offers her a new chance, but she is most comfortable with her older brother Link (short for Lincoln) and his best friend James. She's long had a crush on James, but knows that he just sees her as "the kid sister." When girls at school make comments on the relationship between Link and James, Ellen starts to see something else entirely. Reading everything she can about homosexuality, she sees her brother war with himself and eventually reject James.

For the most part, I thought this was a sensitive and well-written story. Ellen's thoughts and feelings are genuinely curious and loving. Her parents and their fears are realistic. The family's tendency toward silence and avoidance is believable.

The most frustrating paragraph clearly telegraphs the author's opinion:
"Now it's not a big deal. There's AIDS to worry about or getting attacked by a redneck, but that's about it. Only people who don't know better still think it's shameful or wrong to be gay, but not people we know. Not smart people."

Wow. Although this is the *character's* statement, I would say it quite likely reflects the author's perspective on homosexuality. So all devout Christians, muslims, Jews,etc. must be rednecks or non-smart people. That's a pretty big statement.