The Tangled Tale of the Woolgathering Castoffs

By: Sharon Mondragón

Hennepin County Library paperback 275 plus acknowledgements

Published: 2024

Genre: Christian fiction

 

I love this author! She has written another wonderful book. This one deals with the stresses of caregiving for loved ones with Alzheimers as well as the joy of knitting and crocheting for those caregivers. 

 

We first met Rose and her knitting friends in The Unlikely Yarn of the Dragon Lady.  We don't see much of Fran, Margaret, or Jane in this book. Instead, along with Rose at the Fair Meadows Retirement Community, we have:

Jenny - flirty life of the party

Edna - crabby crocheter

Sarah - hyper-focused on health and germs

Laura - teacher

Mr. Alistair Peabody - learning to knit, flirty

Gus - driver for FMRC, heading to med school

Then we have Sam Talbot, faithfully visiting his wife in memory care even though she doesn't know him any more and even starts to be afraid of him. Nan goes to visit her mom and brings along Tara (sulky teenager) and Samantha (enthusiastic but careless knitter). All these (and more) wonderful characters bring the story to life. It took me a few chapters to get into it, but then I devoured the book.

Page 45: "Nan had learned to be 'quick to listen and slow to speak' with Tara, the quieter and more private of her girls. She waited for Tara to find the words to explain."

I really enjoyed the character arcs for both Nan and her daughter Tara. I love that there was tension, but also resolution. I loved that Nan referenced Scripture in dealing with parenting issues! It was so hard for Tara to have Grandma Becca not know her any more . . . 

Page 61: "Fran regarded Margaret across the table. 'Margaret, Ed has been gone almost two years. I'll never quite get over it, but it's time for me to go on with my life. I've seen how fleeting life can be and how it can be cut short in an instant. I intend to live whatever time is ahead of me to the fullest.'"

This was a scene at Hope of Glory. Margaret was nagging about Fran dating Howard. I love Fran's response!

Page 92: "Laura's face was bright with cheerful excitement. Rose thought she must have looked like this often during her career as a high school English teacher. It was clear she was happy to be teaching again."

Even though Laura was not able to successfully teach Sam to knit, I love how energized she was by trying. How fun that Edna was able to get him to crochet instead. There's something powerful about teaching others with joy.

Page 97: "'I wish I didn't have to go at all,' Tara burst out, 'I'd rather remember her the way she was when I was little, before she got sick.'

'You'll always have those memories.' Rose's voice was gentle. 'But these memories are important, too.'

Tara struggled against tears again. 'No, they're not. They're horrible.'

'Trust me, Tara,' Rose said. 'In the years to come, you'll be glad you made memories with her for as long as you could.'"

Oh, the heartbreak and struggle of losing someone to memory loss while they are still alive! I think the author handled the emotions and challenges extremely well.

Page 103: "'She could spend her Christmas money on any of the myriad things teenagers want. But she's buying yarn to make a shawl to give away.'"

Laura gets teary after Tara expresses her plan to use her money to buy yarn to make a prayer shawl. Susan naturally thinks Laura is getting sick! I agree with Laura - it is touching to see a young person behave selflessly. What a blessing!

Page 107: "Yes, there was Dorothy, chatting away with her tablemates, living in the moment. Life is so much simpler for them, he thought. No past, no missing the way things used to be. No future, no worrying about what might happen. That fell to other people, to their caregivers. For Dorothy, there was only now. A now without him in it."

If there's a bright side to dementia, it is this sense of a simpler life. But that compounds the heartaches for the family members, like Sam. Caregiving is hard!

Page 129: "'It's become much more about the people than the place,' Rose said."

Rose has shown Jenny the Prayer Chapel and Jenny falls in love with the beautiful, peaceful space. Rose understands her attraction to it and the necessity of getting out of one's comfort zone. Other people coming to know the Lord is more important than the comfort and peace of the knitters.

Page 138: "'Simply ask God to help him,' Rose said. 'We don't need to know what's wrong to do that.'"

So true! We can pray for people without having the details of their situation. God knows what they need!

Page 146: "Father God, we ask you to remember all those who have loved ones who do not remember them . . . In the embrace of these shawls, may they be strengthened, encouraged, loved, and known."

The shawl maker's prayer was repeated a few times in the book, but I only marked this one. I like that different people prayed (this time was Alistair Peabody) and that he added the names of specific people who were on the Woolgatherers' radar.

Page 157: "Jenny was uncharacteristically quiet on the way back to Fair Meadows. Praying for caregivers in general was one thing, but telling Amy to her face that she'd pray about her relationship with Bryson was another. She realized she now had a stake in how things turned out for the little family. It mattered whether she prayed for them or not."

I love how being a part of this group helped changed Jenny's personal outlook and habits. And yes, offering to pray for someone is a responsibility. But a good one!

Page 205: "'Old people falling in love?' Donna frowned. 'They meet-cute by crashing their walkers together?'"

This line made me laugh! The book club is discussing a romance novel and someone opines that the protagonists are always young people. A discussion of what a romance novel about older people would be like ensues . . . 

Page 208: "She never liked to think past the fairy-tale parts of her marriages. That's why she loved reading all those books about the beginnings of love. She could live in the rosy possibility of happily-ever-after and not remember what happened when the realities of life set in."

Jenny's flippant "fun" personality is rooted in this discrepancy between what she wants life to be like and what she has actually experienced. I'm so glad Louie and I have worked our way through the fairy tale parts (including dragons and battles) and are currently living our happy ever after!

 

Page 213: "He stopped at his favorite fast-food restaurant on the way home, ordering fries and onion rings to go with his double cheeseburger. Since it was abundantly clear he was nothing but the Fat Man, he might as well enjoy it."

Oh, Sam! I recognize this self-destructive behavior. I'm very familiar with this attitude (sadly).

Page 243: "Josh nodded. 'You're right. We should have been here more, for the both of them. Yeah, it was awful to see Mom like that, but we should have braved it for Dad's sake. We should have come to spend time with him. Hard to think of your parents needing you.'"

When Sam collapses with double pneumonia and the flu, it's the Woolgatherers who come to the rescue. His two adult sons have been preoccupied with their own lives and that last statement hit home for me. I was able to help my parents toward the end of their lives, but it made me sad that they needed me so much. It was hard on my 50th birthday to not have parents in my life any more. 

Page 277 (Acknowledgements): "All who have shared their journey of caring for a loved one iwth dementia with me, either in person or through books and articles. I hope so much that you feel seen and loved in the pages of this book."

She is a wonderful author! I've really enjoyed all three of her books and I sincerely hope she writes more!

The Unlikely Yarn of the Dragon Lady

By: Sharon Mondragón

Libby ebook 26 chapters plus acknowledgements

Published: 2021

Genre: Christian realistic fiction

I so enjoyed our book club book by this author that I got this book. Initially, I wasn't a huge fan. Mrs. Benson seemed to be that stereotypically nasty church lady. Also, I'm not a knitter. However, I'm so glad I read this book! I loved it! I have a third book by her on hold at the library . . . 

I made SO many highlights that I think I will need to skip some of them. Dude. I seriously enjoyed this book!

Chapter 1: "Margaret's stomach clenched. 'You mean knit together in public? You mean talk to strangers about church?'"

This is part of what I meant about stereotyping. It honestly isn't that crazy, though. A lot of Christians like to keep their faith separate from life "out there" in the world . . . which is completely opposite of what Jesus teaches. We are to go and proclaim the Good News.

Chapter 1: "His voice was disconcertingly steady, just like his eyes. 'People aren't coming. They don't know they can find peace and love and hope here. They want those things, but many of them think there's mostly judgment and hypocrisy inside church walls. Sadly, in some cases, they're right. The point is they're not coming to us. We have to go to them.'"

This pastor is talking the truth, but Margaret Benson doesn't want to hear it. 

Chapter 2: "Rosalie, confident that she knew what was best for everybody, tended to steamroll her way through life and the lives of those she loved."

Ouch! Rose was my absolutely favorite character, but I think I'm more like her daughter Rosalie than I'd like to admit. I know a lot of people like Rosalie, thinking they knew best for everyone. God's grace - I need it and I appreciate it!

Chapter 2: "Laura chuckled. 'Believe me. Where there are tests there will always be prayer.'"

In Rose's nursing home, her "friends" are more like irritating acquaintances. I love how she shares about knitting at the mall and they are drawn in by her stories of interacting with people they meet and praying for them. Prayer matters!

Chapter 2: "What upsets me, she thought, is how those people downstairs think there's nothing they can do anymore about the state of the world. I may not be able to live alone now or drive a car - safely, anyway - but I can pray. I can pray and knit those prayers into a shawl."

I love Rose! I love her determination to make the best of her situation and make a difference. I love how the next paragraph delves into her prayers and the way she thinks of others and turns her concerns to the Lord.

Chapter 3: "Fran dug around in her purse for the packet of tissues widows learn to keep handy."

This made me stop. I almost always have tissues handy, but I thought it was a mom thing / allergy sufferer thing. I'm so thankful I'm not a widow!

Chapter 5: "'Or maybe some of them are starting to wonder if there's something to this prayer business,' Rose told her. 'And realizing they need God's help.'"

Rose is constantly acting as a counterpoint to Margaret's negativity. Later in this chapter, she interrupts Margaret when Kineasha asks to learn how to knit. "Rose was getting good at heading Margaret off at the pass." Go, Rose!

Chapter 7: "'Oh, you know we're knitting and not crocheting?' Margaret looked at him over her reading glasses. 'Most people don't.'"

I've never understood the passion that people feel about distinguishing between the two . . . but I guess that's because I neither knit nor crochet!

Chapter 7: "'A lot of knitters call this tinking,' Rose told them. 'Tink is the word knit spelled backward. When we tink, we're undoing the stitches, going backward. Tinking is good for when you do the wrong stitch and need to get back to that point to do it over or when you've dropped a stitch and need to pick it up.'"

I love learning new things! I've never heard this term before. Rose explains it beautifully.

Chapter 12: "'Luck is random. Blessing is from God.' Someone had to correct the man."

Margaret is so self-righteous, rigid, and critical that it's embarrassing to think that some people view ALL Christians like this. She's believable as a character, but so darn dislikeable. . . until the end of the story. She is so awful to Howard, but I like how he and Fran (both widowed) connected and became friends.

Chapter 13: "Mishaps like these made the pageant memorable from year to year."

Oh my! One of the things I love best about the children's Christmas pageant every year is seeing what goes "wrong" - it's usually the best part of the show! Fran is remembering the year that the girl playing Mary sneezed so violently that the baby Jesus doll went flying into the air, "caught handily by a surprised but quick-thinking shepherd." I love how her son Eddy asked about her well-being. He missed his dad and knew that his mom missed him, too.

Chapter 13: "But what if we didn't blow out our candles? Jane wondered. What if we took them out of the church with us, carried them home, carried them wherever we went? In her mind's eye, she saw the lights dispersing, spreading wide throughout the darkened city. She saw them shining on the dashboards of cars, in the windows of homes, flickering pinpoints of light in the darkness."

 

I love the Christmas Eve service when we do the candle thing, but I really love Jane's thoughts about the significance of the moment. Shine for Jesus!

 

Chapter  16: "With a sense of subversive glee, she settled into praying, asking God to help Margaret Benson work through whatever was making her miserable."

This is a good reminder! "Pray for those who persecute you." I'm not persecuted, but I definitely have people I don't like to be around. I need to pray for them! God's got this. Jane remembers how much she valued and needed compassion when her son Kenny went to jail. She wants to treat Margaret with God's love.

Chapter 17: "'I remember those days.' Jane watched Amy and Kineasha disappear from view. 'When I was young and every setback seemed like a disaster.'"

One of the best things about aging is gaining perspective! 

Chapter 17: "'We've attracted people at the mall who need our prayers, need us to be there praying. Some of them have never asked for prayer before in their lives. Being out there among all those people has opened my eyes.'"

Jane is having a conversation with Father Pete about continuing to knit and pray in the mall rather than returning to the Prayer Chapel. It can be hard to move out of our comfort zones / routines, but God's way is always better than our own way!

Chapter 17: "That's what she'd do and not even go to church. Let's see how he likes that! She thought with a lift of her chin."

I loved the confrontation between God and Margaret. I've never actually heard God speak to me, but when I'm truly focused on Him in prayer, He definitely guides my thoughts. Margaret trying to "show" God how upset she was and then having Him "talk" to her was fun to read.

Chapter 18 finally shows us why Margaret is the way she is. Her mom had cancer and Margaret refused to have the hard conversations and accept the severity of her illness. Her mom died when Margaret was only twenty-five years old. That loss affected her entire life and the way she parented her children. "Phrases like stage mother and smother mother drifted back to her on the winds of gossip." I love how the author shows us Margaret's heart in these reminiscences, her knitting, and her personal prayer time with God.

Chapter 19: "She smiled and sent up a silent prayer. Radical knitter here, at your service. Any other surprises?"

Rose is a rock star! The other gals at the nursing home are asking her for help with knitting prayer shawls!

Chapter 20: "How could she keep bad things from happening if she wasn't in charge? She gave herself a mental shake. She was getting off track. She was supposed to be praying for Celeste and her mother."

This author doesn't just have Margaret make a 180. She struggles, realizes, grows, changes. I really, really liked how she wrote this. Wanting to be in control is very relatable. Later in the chapter, ". . . she took solace in the whisper and click of her bamboo needles and the way one stitch followed another, row after orderly row. At least she had control of something."

Chapter 21 has Jane realizing that her unresolved anger toward Kenny is preventing her from healing. "Life is short and fragile, she reflected." Yes! And her cleaning frenzy is likened to a child adding more and more people to "bless you" bedtime prayers to stall going to sleep. This is really well-written!

Chapter 21: "Much as she would like to batter him with words so he might feel even an inkling of the pain he'd caused her, she knew these should not be the last words he ever heard from her. If what she was about to write were truly the last words he might ever have from her, what did she truly want them to be?"

I am too good at procrastinating and thinking there will always be time later to deal with relationships, conversations, etc. I'm trying to be better about appreciating each day and the people in my life, but life IS short and precious.

Chapter 21: "Kenny's childhood was over. No amount of hope or regret would bring it back. She couldn't tink his life back to where it went wrong and then knit it back with no mistakes."

We can't go back in time and change our past! As parents, we make mistakes that impact our children. We can't go back and change that, either.

Chapter 23: "Celeste sat back in her chair. 'I'm amazed. You're a . . . You're a dragon whisperer!'"

I loved that the title seemed to imply Margaret as the dragon from the get-go. But to find that Barbara Wentworth was known by her bookstore employees as the "Dragon lady" was very interesting! The expression "it takes one to know one" came to mind.

Chapter 23: "This seems like a strange way to make things better. But please, whatever you do, make things better." 

Margaret's prayers help her to relax and turn both her knitting and praying over to God. 

Chapter 26: "For a brief moment, she wondered if what she'd been doing there all those years had been praying at all. Compared to what had been going on in her craft room lately, it seemed like she'd been mostly laying down the law inside her own head."

Yes! God got through to Margaret! Perhaps I should examine my prayer life . . . 

I actually did skip some of my highlights . . . I really like this author. I hope she keeps writing!

Chapter

Grandma Ruth Doesn't Go to Funerals

By: Sharon J. Mondragón

Jean's copy, paperback, 247 pages (including acknowledgements and a recipe)

Published: 2025

Genre: Christian realistic fiction

I was so ready for a "lighter" book and this one fit the bill! I've been on library waiting lists for a month, but I did find a pdf of the first few chapters online. Thankfully, a book club friend finished early enough to give me her copy in church yesterday. I purposely didn't take a sub job so I could finish it before book club tonight!

Grandma Ruth's health doesn't allow her to attend funerals any more, so she sends her granddaughter Sarah Elizabeth in her stead. The Southern charm is strong in this book and I loved the mystery of what exactly P.B. Harrington meant on his death bed. (We get the answer on the second to last page of the story!)

I'm surprised I stuck so many post-its in, since it's a pretty lightweight book. I think I just enjoyed it so darn much!

Page 27: "The macaroni and cheese casserole had been polished off long ago, but I didn't swing by the kitchen to take the dish home. Under Patti Sue's supervision, it was undoubtedly already washed, dried, and sitting on a counter, but I was under strict instructions from Grandma Ruth to retrieve the casserole dish one week after the reception, so as to visit with (read that check on) the bereaved."

Grandma Ruth was a wise old gal. She had Sarah trained well!

Page 31: "Grandma Ruth fixed me with a stare that told me I was indulging in wild speculation that bordered on disrespect. It was just a look, but it had all those words in it."

I love when people have a "look" that communicates so much more than words!

Page 47: "But as I looked into those kind eyes, something stirred, as if hope had caught its breath. I took a moment to clear the lump of gratitude from my throat before I went back into the parlor."

This is one of my favorite parts of the book! Doc Milford's words of encouragement were what she needed after having had such a bad experience with Jake. (I groaned when she was tempted by Jake coming back into her life and trying to sweet talk her back.) The image of "as if hope had caught its breath" really struck me. Hope is powerful!

Page 48: "I know most people my age keep their lives on their phones, but I like paper, section tabs, and fancy writing implements."

Me, too! I love office supplies.

Page 55: "She's been nitpicky about everything to do with words since high school, which explains why she has taken so well to working in a law office. I'm a numbers girl and could care less. Or is it couldn't care less? Never mind - you know what I mean."

This just made me giggle. I'm more of a words person than a number person, but I love this little aside.

Page 99: "During our final confrontation, the one in which I threw the engagement ring at him across the room, he told me that the situation was all my fault. He would never have taken up with Buffy if I had just given in.

He said calling off the wedding was a lucky escape for him, as I was probably frigid, anyway. It was as if he never realized just how warm my heart and all the rest of me was toward him, how my blood roared in my ears when he touched me, or how many times the only thing that kept me from going over the brink was the mental image of Grandma Ruth's piercing blue eyes."

He was such an awful creep! I understand her desire and temptation, but am SO glad that it was drilled in to her to not have sex before marriage. She experienced heartache, but not to the degree she would have had she "given in" to him.

Page 122: "I hated having to read between the lines, with all the suspicion and second-guessing that went with it."

She goes on, but my patience ran out. Stop jumping to conclusions!

Page 127: "Then, I cried and cried and felt that God was too big. Too big to care about me. My broken heart was a mere drop in the bucket of the vast suffering in the world."

 

God being too big . . . her grandma means it in a way that was meant to encourage Sarah to trust Him, not to make her think He was too big to care about her.

 

Page 161: "'I do not gossip, Sarah Elizabeth, nor do I pass gossip,' Grandma Ruth said through tight lips.

'Of course not,' I said. 'You gather information.'

'That's right, young lady, and don't you forget it.'"

 

The whole focus on gossip / not gossiping got a little old . . . according to the Bible, gossip is sin. Period.

Page 174: "Remember, 'if your lips you would keep from slips, five things regard with care -'

"I know, I know. 'Of whom you speak, to whom you speak, and how and when and where.'"

 

When  Sarah's mom starts the saying and Sarah finishes it, I love that they have that common knowledge / teaching. That's a good way to raise kids - with sayings that help them learn the right way to live and speak.

Page 181: "It was bad enough that his credit cards were maxed out and it looked like I'd have to pick up the check. But he also didn't know which of his cards he'd maxed out. That says he doesn't pay attention to his money and probably lives beyond his means. So, it doesn't matter if he comes into an inheritance or not. It'll be gone in no time, and he'll have no idea where it went."

Ugh. People like this baffle me. Don't spend money you don't have. Don't live beyond your means. I love that Meredith saw this right away on a first date!

Page 226: "Yes, I know I told Miss Charlotte she looked lovely when she really looked like something the cat dragged in, but that's different. Completely, bless-your-heart different."

Lying is lying, Sarah. But the Southern "bless your heart" reference clarifies it.

I enjoyed the book and have even requested another title by this author. The recipe in the back was for the "famous" macaroni and cheese dish. I was kind of hoping it would be for the lemon bars . . . It will be fun to talk about this at book club tonight. I'm so glad I had the chance to finish it!