The Healing of Natalie Curtis

by Jane Kirkpatrick

Dakota County Library paperback 326 pages plus author's notes, etc.

Published: 2021

Genre: Christian historical fiction

 

I'm sorry to say that I struggled to finish this book. I'm not 100% sure why I had to force myself to read it, but I'm glad I'm finally done! It's puzzling because the topic is interesting and important. Natalie Curtis was a real person and her life's work was significant. She just wasn't a compelling protagonist for me. That said, I've got a LOT of post-it notes in this book! I missed the book club meeting in June (we were at the lake) but I know at least one other person who's usually an avid reader didn't finish this title.

 

Basically, Natalie Curtis trained as a musician but suffered a breakdown. She went out West with her brother George to recover her health. She ended up becoming an ethnomusicologist and battling against the Indian Code. She had a connection to President Theodore Roosevelt and used it to try to change policy.

 

Page 35 - "A Norwegian summary had to be translated into English, and she silenced the voice that said she ought to learn Norwegian so she could be certain of the text. She knew German. I could learn. She stopped herself. This was where her intensity and perfectionism led her down a terrible trail. She already knew what lay at the end of that."

Though I wouldn't call myself a perfectionist, I certainly know what this feels like! "I could . . . " can open doors, but it can also drag one down! My sister Ann calls this the "woulda coulda shoulda" struggle.

Page 41 - "'I got lost in time. The reports, Mimsey, they were so . . . tragic.' She told her mother some of what she'd read while she pulled her gloves from her fingers."

Natalie's mother means well, but her desire for her daughter to have a "nice" life conflicted with Natalie's awareness of how awful the Indian Code was for the People themselves.

Page 64 - The scene where Eva Lummis shows Natalie around the house, describing the "belongings" that add personality to the rooms. Natalie initially calls them artifacts but Eva explains their significance to the Pueblo people. (I'm too lazy to put the whole passage here!)

I just really liked this scene, especially when they get to Armando's room. The little boy died when he was six and he had a beloved wooden carved horse. Very touching!

Page 75 - "But as the days passed, Natalie's spirits rose, and on the morning walks in the balmy air, she found herself able to enjoy the sights and sounds, feel the warm sun without the constant push to "do" something, "go" somewhere, "fix" herself. She was purpose-less . . . "

That sounds so lovely! Too often, there is such a sense of "Go go go" to life. She fell in love with the Southwest and the pace and peace of life there.

Page 77 - "It's unjust. And being committed by people who claim to be Christians, wanting to win their souls while destroying their spirits. They are not professing the faith that I was taught."

Charles Lummis' anger is in response to white people humiliating and hurting native people. I think part of the reason I didn't love this book is because I recognize the pain and evil that was done to the native people . . . and I'm a hundred-plus years too late to "fix" it. And yes, it is especially hard when people do horrible things in the name of Christianity. Jesus loved and served.

Page 103 - "'But it's the cadence and timing that requires such deep concentration on my part. Their music is so singular.' She drank her warm tea. Ice was like gold in Yuma. 'I've been thinking. When Rome conquered the Greeks, they learned from them. We should be doing the same, learning from the Indians, not trying to silence them.'"

 

There is so much more to this passage! Natalie is talking with her brother George, with whom she spent a great deal of time as she traveled in the West.

 

Page 106 - "'Um, there was no corn, no dance, no drum, no Yuma song. Only Anglo song. The child is shamed and tries to disappear. The others join to comfort her.'" 

I love love love Chiparopai! What an amazing woman, speaking three languages (including English!). When she visits a school with Natalie and the teacher sings Happy Birthday to a little girl, Natalie is the only other person who sings along. But instead of being pleased, the girl hides under a table and cries. Then the other children climb under the table with her and surround her! Compassion and understanding! Chiparopai explains to Natalie what she just observed. My heart!

Page 122 - "'Perseverance,' George said. 'Deciding what really matters and letting the rest go.'"

This is after Natalie comments on how hard a trail ride can be and wonders how people traveling the Oregon and Santa Fe trails could put up with all the dust for months. Her brother hits the nail on the head. Sometimes all a situation needs is the right attitude and perseverance.

Page 157 - "Lololomai didn't spin, gave his full attention to her. She had noticed that about the Hopi and the Yuma and the Navajo. They concentrated when someone spoke to them, perhaps deciphering the language barrier, but maybe because they listened to understand rather than to respond."

I am so bad about this! I need to work on my listening skills and be respectful of other people!

Page 249 - "'So. White people prefer to hear white people,' he said. 

'I don't,' Natalie told him. 'I'd rather hear you talk about your life and the songs and where they came from.' 

'It is a show when we do it for Anglos. At home, when we sing or tell the stories, it is a gift. Our spirits are happy then.' 

'In the book, though, you won't be 'at home.' Your words and music will be spread far and wide.' 

He often kept a grace pause before he spoke. 'So. It is what will be in this new trail we are asked to walk.'"

Hiamovi was such a fantastic person to better help Natalie understand some of the cultural differences further. 

Page 253 - " . . . emphasizing for Natalie the sturdy rope tying past to present."

I like expressions like this - "the sturdy rope tying past to present." Hiamovi is explaining to her how "we" used to do things, although he's talking about his ancestors from much earlier generations. Kirkpatrick is a talented author; I'm sorry this book just didn't connect for me on a heart level.

Page 265 - "But she was doing it to preserve the ancient arts, songs, and dances, not to destroy them by bringing tourists. One didn't always have control over the outcome of pursuing a purpose. The publication and promotion would be a balancing act."

It is easy to look back and have the wisdom of hindsight, but it can indeed be difficult to tell what will result from your efforts.

Page 281 - "'It will be a very fluffy book,' Angel said. Natalie looked confused. 'Fat. We use "fluffy" for fat as a term of what you Anglos call endearment."

Yes! "Fluffy" instead of "fat" needs to catch on!

Page 295 - "It was finished. Natalie didn't feel a whit of satisfaction."

Sigh. Not a surprise. This is where I differ from the character. I love to celebrate successes! Woohoo! She got the book published!

Something Worth Doing

by Jane Kirkpatrick

Carver County Library paperback 299 plus author notes

Published:2020

Genre: Christian historical fiction

 

We already discussed this book at book club a week ago. I was on chapter four. I've struggled with reading this one and I'm not entirely sure why. I'm relieved to be done with it finally and yet there are a LOT of post-it notes sticking out. 

 

Kirkpatrick's books are usually both informative and entertaining, but the story of Abigail Scott Duniway and her suffragist work in Oregon didn't capture my attention. I think my favorite part was the "Author's Notes" at the end; I'm always impressed by the quality and quantity of her research. The fictional book hews closely to the recorded history!

 

Since I want to finish this blog entry and get the book back to the library, I'm going to try to be brief.

• "But then, we all make mistakes. Can't let the count of them hammer too long and hard at your chest, or it'll break your heart. Won't go far with a broken heart. You'll have to find a way to mend it or be miserable for life." (pg. 36 Ben to Abigail. Wise words.)
• "She begged for forgiveness, and why shouldn't she have it? Wasn't that what Christian compassion was all about, making space for healing from the hardness of life?" (pg. 41 Abigail's stepmother . . . yes. Forgiveness should be a key part of Christians' lives. Yet too often it's not.)
• Pg. 51 writing the limerick . . . something to rhyme with wife and strife . . . really? LIFE! Then on the next page, that's what she chooses. . . 
• "They turned together toward a crying Willis, lying in his cradle. 'I'll leave it to you to change the world. I'll just change his diaper.'" (pg. 66 Ben talking to Abigail. He really is portrayed as an extraordinary man, loving the simple things of life and supporting Abigail's passions.)
• "In the same way that she brushed by little joys that she didn't think she deserved, she tamped down sadness by getting to work." (pg. 108 Abigail was such a mixed bag of almost negative determination and hopeful optimism. She bugged me.)
• "Without Ben to put the nasty reply letters into perspective, she dwelt overmuch on negativity rather than on hope. One needed others to nurture optimism, or at least she was finding that she did." (pg. 111 Yup. But if you only rely on others for your own attitude, you're in trouble.)
•  "Abigail continued her teaching, but she knew it wasn't enough. Contentedness wasn't a part of who she was, she decided." (pg. 133 Again, yup. She strove. A lot.)
• "I wish I knew for certain this was the best path to take. And I so wish we had a map to get us there." "There's little certainty in the world, Jenny. Except attitude and effort." (pg. 137 Abigail / Jenny and Ben. I love Ben! Yes on attitude and effort!)
• "Relationships were so unpredictable, and she longed for certainty - certainty she could control." (pg. 153 Abigail considering a business partner. She has serious control issues for sure!)
• "There must be a few men who share our hopes. Ben does. I'm so grateful for that." (pg. 160 Abigail talking to her friend Shirley. She seems to need continual reminders to appreciate her own husband. . . )
• "Trying to be diplomatic is not my forte, as you well know. It takes more energy to hold my tongue than to live with a little business uncertainty." (pg. 164 Abigail talking to Ben about getting rid of her business partner . . . At least she realized her own shortcomings.)
• The part on Sarah Wallis . . . was familiar. I wonder if she's featured in a different Kirkpatrick book. Pg. 184
• "The offer brought a surprising calm." (pg. 188 When Shirley offers to pray for Abigail before she gives a speech. Love Shirley!)
  
• "She loved the feel of the paper . . . it all appealed to her." (pg. 197 When Abigail gets her printing press and starts The New Northwest. Kirkpatrick's writing shines with the joy of someone in their element!)
• "'Give, and it shall be given unto you,' as Scripture says." (pg. 207 I love that Susan B. Anthony was charitable and familiar with Scripture. Her life story is one I am interested in learning more about.)
• Abigail's speech on page 210 where she talks about God's creation and her husband's support as a reflector of God's light . . . I like this part. If it's true that people were heckling her and throwing eggs when she talked them into listening, then it's even better!
• "She'd given her life for this cause, and she wasn't ready to let younger, ill-informed women threaten the campaign." (pg. 218 This scene was troubling when she shot down other women's suggestions. She's denying them their voice and opinion when that's theoretically what she's fighting for . . . Her singlemindedness was extreme and her way or the highway!)
• Her reaction to Clara Belle's marriage . . . was a bit hard to swallow. Your firstborn. Your only daughter. Your only grandchild. You're too busy and mad about her eloping to even go and visit her? Get a clue! (pg. 236)
• "'You'll always be a reformer. I just wish for your sake you'd take more time for being a grandmother and a wife. I get wistful sometimes, seeing you leave Ben as you go off. Makes me miss John so much.' Kate cleared her throat. 'And I'm sad for you that you're passing up moments you'll never have again, experiences I so wish I still could have.'" (pg. 237 Abigail's younger sister Kate, wiser by a long shot!)
• The whole scene on page 273 with Clara Belle and Don. Ugh. Ben is my hero!
  
• "Her second youngest son was sixteen already. He had a beard. How had her boys grown up without her noticing?" (pg. 279 Because she was gone all the time and cared more about her cause than her family!)
• The discussion on page 281 about moving and the definition of the word "powerful." Of COURSE she gave her definition first before letting her students define it. And of COURSE her definition is "one can set a goal and then figure out how to make it happen." But I really love the fictional student who defines it as "when you want to quit but you keep going."
• "Outwardly, Abigail brushed away the compliment, but she took it inside, let it fill her up." (pg. 285 Ugh. She really did seem to need attention and appreciation a lot. Not my favorite character trait!)
• "As she thought of her ever-hopeful and adventurous life, a shiver ran up her spine." (pg. 288 It surprised me that Kirkpatrick would write that. I suppose to keep working on something for over forty years does show a sort of hopefulness . . . but that it not how I would define Abigail.)
• Page 293 when Shirley and Kate talk about how much Abigail means to them and others . . . this made her seem more lovable somehow, but her stridency and prickliness had already left their mark for me.
• "A fierce love for justice and liberty for all of us. That's your legacy." (pg. 295 Kate to Abigail. I love thinking about legacy and what mine will be . . . I'm honestly not sure.)
• "The world is moving and women are moving with it." (pg. 299 and *often* throughout the book. That was Abigail's catch phrase. Sometimes I had to think of how much it would have chafed me to live when I could not vote, could not own property, did not have rights in cases of divorce or dispute . . . there's so much I take for granted that women like Abigail Scott Duniway fought for to make sure that other women would benefit.)
  

One More River to Cross

by Jane Kirkpatrick
Scott County Library paperback 330 pages, plus author's notes
genre: Christian historical fiction

Kirkpatrick does an amazing job of researching an historical event and writing a fascinating story around its players. In this one, a group of California-bound pioneers try crossing the Sierra Nevada and encounter difficulties galore. This group made the attempt the year before the doomed Donner Party. (In fact, some of the Donners used a cabin built by the Stephens-Murphy-Townsend company.)

I hadn't read the book before book club, so didn't have much to add to the conversation. Below are the plethora of pages I tagged with some thoughts and observations. Overall, this was a very engaging read. There are a LOT of different characters. Right when I started it and saw the listing of names, relationships, etc. I realized it would be a challenge to keep everyone straight. She did an excellent job of differentiating, but I generally prefer stories where I identify strongly with characters and don't have to work as hard to remember who's who! The text below may contain *SPOILERS* and / or be boring to those who've not read the book. :-)


Flyleaf - She has this quote from Mary Anne Radmacher: "Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice that at the end of the day says 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"I love this!

Page 35 - "It was at the evening camp and Capt took out his journal from his saddlebages. He always reread what he'd written." This isn't especially profound, but I am a huge fan of journaling! I don't write as often as I used to, but it is wonderful to read the thoughts and feelings one experienced in a different point in life. Some of the most amazing "stories" throughout history have been recorded by someone and now we can appreciate them. This made me wonder if we would get to read some of Capt's journal later in the story.

Page 49 - "'I'm the mother of five. Fun isn't necessarily in my basket of essentials.'" - This reply by Ailbe to the comment that "She needs a little fun" made me laugh! Mothers can be so very down-to-earth.

Page 63 - "We should have joined them. She shook her head. What's done is done. Sometimes she thought of her life as a thin, scratchy book held between the bookends of fear and regret and fear. She needed to rewrite that book, make it sturdier. And find new bookends for sure." Mary Sullivan is a strong and determined young woman. The language in this description of her life (or her perception of her life) doesn't match with how I imagined her, but I liked it just the same.

Page 79 - "She hated it that he only seemed to pay attention to what she was feeling when she lost control and cried. Crying made her weak in his eyes so he could 'lift her up' rather than speak to her as another adult to come to some grown-up resolution." Sarah did get on my nerves at times, but her newlywed husband Allen was a total jerk.

Page 89 - "'Something haunts your brother,' Beth said. 'He carries anger, swallows it, licks his lips without knowing he is eating himself. He is in need of laughter. He doesn't know what wealth lies within it. Be patient with him.'" Beth is one of the most lovely and loving characters. The relationship between Ellen and her brother Daniel is one that develops throughout the story. I appreciate it!

Page 92 -"She nodded, acceptance settling like a threadbare cloak over her shoulders: it offered comfort but without the warmth. The real treasure was this moment when she felt loved and cared for more than she had since the day they'd married. She guessed it would be her anniversary gift." I really liked that first sentence. Again, Allen is not a very impressive husband. Poor Sarah!

Page 98 - I love when Mary grabs the ox and just goes! Capt wants her brother John to lead, but she's ready to GO. I can relate. I see a lot of myself in Mary.

Page 116 - When the women are sharing their stories, Mary has a new perspective. "Maybe carrying on despite grief was a hidden gift." Sometimes our perception of "gifts" misses some things out of the ordinary.

Page 139 - "It was the least she could do to honor the being that gave them nourishment." This made me think of Mari's mom Rita and her prayers over meals.

Page 140 - "Don't tell me what I've done or not correctly." This made me laugh! Husbands should handle pregnant wives with kid gloves! I was as contrary as can be when I was pregnant.

Page 165 - "He'd gotten crankier on this journey, while Mr. Hitchcock - in his late sixties - had gotten more jovial. Maybe it didn't matter how many years you had but how well you carried them." Such truth in this! When my dad was so negative and complained about everything, I made myself think about the choices I was making in terms of my attitude and communication. I want to carry my years well . . .

Page 172 - "If not, I trust God is with us whatever choice we make. . . . . Truth is, I'd rather be happy than right." I love Ailbe! She has a good attitude and recognizes that God is in control.

Page 181 - When Ellen talks to Daniel about how the fire in the mercantile got started, I was a bit taken aback . . . She saw cowardice in herself; I see complicity.

Page 192-3 - I love how Daniel and Ellen come to understand one another better and develop a much stronger and healthier brother / sister relationship. This was one of my favorite aspects of the story. The "Horseback Party" was a smaller group and had a more engaging storyline.

Page 205 - When Capt sweet talks Dr. Townsend into pushing on . . . pure genius. It does highlight Townsend's ego,t hough.

Page 218 - "Land is free in Oregon. We just take it from the Indians." Ugh. It's a fictionalized version of a real person saying this (Allen talking to his wife Sarah.) . . . but knowing that it represents some people's true opinions AND actions historically . . . just makes me mad / sad.

Page 220 - "We're having to remake ourselves." Sarah says this to Mary as they talk about taking apart a wool sweater to re-knit it and how it's like they are remaking themselves due to the hardships they're experiencing. It's wonderful that we can transform and don't have to get into a rut.

Page 241 - "It must be made American, taken for Americans, held by Americans." Sutter is trying to convince the men to ride to war instead of going back to rescue the rest of their party. Historically, there were battles to "hold" the West . . . but this reminded me of current-day "America First" rhetoric. I prefer to look at humanity more globally.

Page 260 - "Guess when you find success in something, all the pain getting there gets washed away." This is often true. Hardship mellows (if not goes away completely) when you've achieved your goal.

Page 290 - "Com once meant 'the exchange of burdens.' And union means 'together.' I guess when we are joined together in a gathering, we share our troubles. Or should." I love that definition for communion! And Sarah and Mary also talk about it in terms of marriage. The exchange of burdens together.

Page 296 - "Why was it that the food of goodness was often seasoned with guilt?" It's an interesting metaphor. I like words that make me think.

Page 332 - In the author's notes, she included this line that surprised me. "The decision by the men to become conscripted before sending rescue continues to baffle historians and others, including me. I'm hopeful that my explanation rings true." It was one of those odd moments while reading the book - why on earth would the men be persuaded to ride to war instead of rescuing their wives and children??? But as an author, she was being true to the history! That's what they did.

Page 337 - Also author notes - "A room in the Sunnyvale Heritage Park Museum in Sunnyvale, California, is devoted to the Murphy family." Cool! I need to visit museums more. I love this stuff!

Page 339 - "Their feats are overshadowed by the Donner Party disaster. It's my hope that this story might celebrate the honor of self-sacrifice, the wisdom of working together, and the power of persevering through community and faith." This is one of the big reasons I appreciate Jean Kirkpatrick. I've heard of the Donner party and their cannibalism. I'd never before heard of this group that made the same trip successfully the year before them.

Everything She Didn't Say

by Jane Kirkpatrick
Carver County Library paperback 333 pages
genre: Christian historical fiction

Although this book wasn't nearly as engaging as other titles I've read by this author, I certainly marked plenty of pages! Based on the real-life travels and memoirs of Carrie Adell Strahorn and Robert Strahorn, the "story" at times felt like more of a travelogue. Book club is in less than an hour, so I'm just going to put some quick notes here.

Page 22: "I often longed for where I'd been and where I wasn't. It was a lesson of living I hadn't yet learned about, finding the blessings of each moment." Though I get sick of people talking about "living in the moment," I need this lesson as well . . . I'm too often in a hurry to cross things off my list. Finding the blessings of each moment resonates for me.

Page 58: "My old pattern of memorizing Scripture came in handy, and I repeated a psalm as a mantra: 'Be still and know that I am God.' I saw it as a promise that God would have our backs rather than as a chastisement to be quiet."

Page 78: When Robert has trouble catching his breath after moving a trunk, I thought that he was surely going to die soon. This was at least his third illness and I just didn't think he was going to last very long!

Page 83: When she is telling her sister about the Chinese who "lay rail lines, dig in mines, cook, do laundry, sleep in colonies separate from others, and they send all their money home to family." This truthful depiction of Chinese labor is historically accurate and it makes me sad how they were treated when their labor was no longer wanted.

Page 86 and 90: When she finds out that Robert had mumps when he was young and was probably infertile . . . what a gut-punch! And he never told her about it, even though she wanted children. And when she confronted him about it, his excuses / explanations were pathetic and self-serving. Ugh!

Page 113: Might be my favorite part! "The effect of a compliment seasoning hard, dreary days was something I could give and vowed to do that more. Kindness. To notice small moments of service, even asking for a woman's name, brought joy out of proportion to the simple act. We all want to be known."

Page 117: "I overheard one of them refer to me once as 'bossy' and I'm not. I just knew what others should be doing." Hahaha! This made me laugh out loud.

Page 139: "'I'm not jesting. We all hear voices inside. Things Mama told us when we were little that remind us of some action to take in the present. Husbands tell us things we let stew inside our heads and hearts, even when they aren't present. It's not always for the best." There's some truth in this! I am trying to be better about listening to the Holy Spirit - my favorite little voice!

Page 154: "A bit of a stuffy title, but then a title is meant to tell a reader what's inside and it surely did that. I do think it's why I love to read novels, though, because the titles are meant to intrigue, perhaps be a double entendre." I'm always looking for the book title connection within the text of the novel. I love this!

Page 186: ". . . it's how we respond to the broken tracks that matters, because there will always be brokenness. It's what we do with the punches we take, the heart-stopping moments, those are the knives that carve out who we are." I love the author's language here!

Page 187: "Fear's an elixir that feeds anxiety and drains common sense." One of the few things that Robert said that I liked . . .

Page 227: "Women have a way of knowing what another needs. Some of us struggle with receiving kindness."

General observation: I love the dogs! And using "B-flat" to indicate "down" is genius, especially for a music lover.

Page 313: Her observations on the impact of Manifest Destiny also make me sad . . . history is full of grandeur and pain. I do love that chapter 36 is titled "What She Didn't Say" . . . and the connection she made in the author's note about her sister sticking with the cheery news and omitting the difficulties.

Page 329: In the author's notes, she points out that his wife of fifty years merited three sentences in his life's memoir. Then she goes on to write "Robert remarried a year after Carrie's death in 1925 and in that same memoir wrote twenty-six pages about his second wife and their two years of travel in Europe." What a jerk!

All She Left Behind

by Jane Kirkpatrick
Carver County Library paperback 319 pages
genre: Christian historical fiction
* There are spoilers below! Stop after the page 141 note if you don't want the plot revealed.*

The discussion at book club last night was very interesting, but we didn't talk in depth about the book itself as much as the themes it raised: alcoholism, marriage, divorce, parenting, etc. I have a lot of post-its, but overall this was not a book that I really enjoyed deeply. I'm pretty sure it's my own attitude; Kirkpatrick is a lovely writer. She has clearly done an extensive amount of research, basing her book on actual people.

page 20 - "Justice and mercy both are required of us" - Jennie says to her husband as they're talking about people who end up in prison. Charles shoots her down, of course, and it's ironic in light of what his future holds.

page 27 - "Jennie didn't believe in coincidences, but rather accepted that a larger hand turns the world and humans were small parts within it." That made me think of the phrase "God-incidences" to observe how God can provide opportunities for us that seem happenstance but are actually very purposeful.

page 73 - "Charles has promised to help me with the love apples we've planted. Tomatoes, I believe they call them now." I've heard that expression "love apples" before, but this is one of those times that reading something in a novel made me search out more info. I love that!

page 78 - "'That Danish philosopher Kierkegaard said he'd give up wealth and power for the "passionate sense of the potential, for the eye which, ever young and ardent, sees the possibilities."'" I should read more Kierkegaard (and/or talk with smarter people than myself) to dig into the meaning of this. We talked about it a little last night, but got off-track.

page 83 - When Jennie brings to mind "Let us not grow weary in doing good, for in due season, we shall reap, if we do not lose heart," it almost seems out of place. Her husband is behaving erratically, has taken their child, and has stayed out all night. I get the encouragement to not lose heart, but how was she doing good? Feeding her son's hedgehog?

page 133 - "'I myself, do not do well with sick people. I so admire those who do.' . . . 'Meeting the needs of another is a gift not everyone has.' Jennie blushed but inhaled her words." When Henrietta (Elizabeth's and Josiah's daughter-in-law) made these observations, I love how she expressed them. I also love how this encouragement blessed Jennie. Encouragement is so important!

page 139 - "In that moment she knew that she would do whatever it took to stay alive, to be there for her son." Finally! I was glad Jennie fought back against the abusive addict Charles! I just wish she had been more transparent with her son instead of "protecting" him from the truth of how horrible his dad was. (Though again, we had a great conversation about this last night. Sometimes putting the child's well-being first means couching the truth in age-appropriate language.)

page 141 - "She couldn't tell him that his father had come back for money to feed his addiction. It wouldn't matter. Douglas' broken heart filtered the memory." Yeah. Kids get hurt no matter which way this falls out.

page 147 - "To ask to love and grieve at the same moment can only be accomplished with the strength of God's cradling." Her observations about the end of life and new life (Elizabeth's impending death and Baby Winifred) remind Jennie of her daughter who died at birth. God makes all the difference in the world!

Page 169 - Yuk. My post-it says "26 and 63? Just no." Again, we had a great discussion about this last night. I get that age gaps of this kind weren't that abnormal. I get that Josiah was an amazing man. But I still think a man marrying a woman almost young enough to be his GRANDdaughter is gross! (Though I appreciate the author's notes at the end and the fact that he ended up marrying a third time after Jennie died.)

page 177 - "Then we'll decide if it's worth the risk." "Every step forward is." . . . "My father once told me, a carriage is safest in the livery stable, but a carriage isn't built for that sedentary place. It's built to roll upon the roads to unknown places." "And on to unknown trails, making new ones." I love this conversation between Jennie and Josiah. It's so true - what is safest isn't always what's best, or even what's intended. I think of that with our faith. It's "safest" to keep it to ourselves and just carry the knowledge of salvation in our hearts . . . but that is not at all what God intends for us to do with the awesome gift!

page 223 - "She even expressed a word of thanks to Charles who had left her and again forgave him, forgiveness being a journey rather than a destination." There were so many times I really liked Jennie's attitude. This is one of them. As much pain as he inflicted on her, she was able to move on and reflect in a healthy way.

I love her friend Ariyah! I appreciate Jennie's kindness to the madam when they saw her in the milliner's shop. I like her brother George who built a distillery for her oils for her (and encouraged her). I like chapter 33 (starting on page 256) and all the conversation about guilt and forgiveness. Ariyah is helping Jennie after Nora's death. "Nicholas Rowe, the English writer. He said that guilt was 'the avenging fiend that follows us behind with whips and stings.' You've whipped yourself enough about Charles and Douglas and now dear little Nora. It's time you looked through a new lens." So much good stuff in this chapter! But I'm mostly glad for our discussion last night. What a great group of women!

This Road We Traveled

by Jane Kirkpatrick
Hennepin County Library paperback 322 pages plus author notes
genre: Christian historical fiction, Oregon Trail

This was a "like, not love" book for me. I enjoyed discussing it with Katie and Jodi. I always love to hear other people's perspectives! Yeah for book club!

Early on, the book frustrated me with the "men tell the women what to do." I know it's historically accurate, but it bugs me. I liked that Tabby was feisty and spoke her mind, but it took me a while (almost half the book) to begin enjoying the story.

page 102 - conversation between Virgilia and Tabitha - "Ultimately we really only have the choice of trusting that God's with us, willing ourselves to walk with him as we walk this earth, learning from the roads we take." (I hope to someday have this kind of faith and wisdom.)

page 145 - Tabby talking with Judson - "'We gather facts, then listen to our hearts and live with the results.' Wasn't that the way of life? Nobody knows what lies ahead. And if they did, truth be known, they might never have started out."

page 152 - John talking to Tabby about her role in her family - "But there's an aura of wisdom in your efforts, in the way you've lived your life that acts as a beacon for them, for us all. You have a hopeful spirit." (I love that phrase - "hopeful spirit" - I would like to be seen that way.)

page 177 - Pherne talking to Tabby - "Mother, you have the ability to turn sour into sweet. I wish I had half of that imaginative stew."

page 187 - Tabby's observation while they're traveling rough ground on the alternate trail - "Her granddaughters were no longer interested in spelling bees or discovering new words or facts. Being tired and hungry sure affected a child's learning spirit." (Yep. That is so very true! Hence the biggest issue for children of poverty is getting enough food to be ABLE to learn!)

page 198 - the turning point for me. I was finally invested in the story and what happened to these characters. This is the scene where John and Tabby leave on the horses to try to catch up to the front groups who have the cattle and get help, food, something for the families and wagons that are struggling.

page 241 - the conversation between Orus and Tabby. The difficulty of mother-son relationships at times . . .

page 251 - Pherne and Virgil talking - "'Promise me you'll try to see your mother today. I know she can be a trial, but you always seem cheered after you've been with her.' Cheered? Maybe so. 'Right after I feel terrible that I'm so woeful while she who has less than anyone can be so stalwart.' She whispered then, 'I actually sometimes resent her.' He laughed. 'Envy takes its toll. But think of it this way: some of her undaunted courage rubbed off on you, Pherne Pringle.'" (I can relate to Pherne's feelings of inadequacy and frustration! I wish I could relate more to Tabby's stalwart, positive attitude!)

page 269 - Virgilia contemplating her future and her relationship with Fabritus - "Until this journey west, she hadn't thought much about what it took to support another, to keep alive, find ways to sustain a family, and perhaps one day prosper beyond what her own family had done. She couldn't help but remember their comfortable life back in Missouri where they wanted for nothing, where books could be loaned out, read and returned, and necessities and luxuries purchased off supply ships sent down the Missouri from the East." (Why on earth would anyone leave this to travel the Oregon Trail and start from scratch?!)

page 322 - the end of Tabby's note to her granddaughter Sarelia - "We must keep both our feet and wings in good repair to face the uncertain road that is our life." (Love this! The author had a lot of primary source material to write this novel based on the real-life Tabitha Moffat Brown.)

The Memory Weaver

by Jane Kirkpatrick
Hennepin County Library paperback 327 pages
genre: Christian historical fiction

I didn't really get into this book, though I finished reading it. Skipped book club tonight, too . . . not like me. The author didn't engage me in the story, starting with a convoluted set-up - a long list of characters, a map, a prologue set in 1847, and then a story that goes from her earliest childhood memories (but not the one in the prologue) to her mother's funeral when Eliza was thirteen. There were many times when I had to force myself to read on. Either this was simply not the right book for me at this time, or Kirkpatrick's style just doesn't resonate for me. There were some nice moments and some very thoughtful observations, but overall I just didn't like the book.

A Clearing in the Wild

by Jane Kirkpatrick
Hennepin County Library, paperback, 365 pages

Historical fiction based on a true story. A German Christian community located in Missouri sends scouts out to find land out west for the group to move to and develop. Emma is outspoken and determined, qualities that alienate her from the group's leader, "Father" Wilhelm Keil. She falls in love with the much older Christian and seeks to be the perfect wife.

I didn't like this story. The characters bugged me. It wasn't compelling. My favorite scene was when she left with her baby, the goat, and the tarp. Our discussion last night at Gretchen's was fantastic! I love hearing what other people think of a book. We have such a fantastic group of women in our book club! It was fun to hear why other people liked it, even though I didn't.