Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage: Unlocking the Secrets to Life, Love, and Marriage

by Mark Gungor
Hennepin County Library paperback 275 pages
genre: Non-fiction, Christian, marriage
published: 2008

My pastor has mentioned this book and author many times. I have enjoyed this video from one of his sessions before: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3XjUFYxSxDk

The book is worth reading, but it wasn't that helpful / interesting / informative to me. Perhaps because I've been married for over thirty years and we get along really well . . . this just didn't inspire me. That said, I tagged some spots. (The only note I jotted was "okay . . . good parts . . . sex / God-given gift . . . Not that funny . . . ")

The section on "Differences Foster Conflict" was one of the best sections in my opinion.


Chapter 11 is titled "What's Sex Got to Do with It?" He writes, "I must mention that there are two groups of people who take issue with my approach to this subject. The first are those representing academia. . . . It's not that I'm trying to be tawdry or crude (though I have frequently been accused of being so), it's that I think God created sex to be fun . . . The other group I seem to offend is the radically prudish religious crowd." He quotes from Ezekiel 23: 19-21 to point out how the Bible talks about this issue. It made me think of the time I read from the Song of Solomon to my mom (for the shock value for her - the Catholic Church had never shared that part of Scripture with her!) Later in the chapter he writes, "Let me say that I do understand that many are reticent to even bring up the subject of sex . . . because of the way sexuality has been abused in our culture." He has a lot of wisdom in this chapter.

In Chapter 16, this line caught my attention: "Virtually anyone can experience a wonderful sex life regardless of their past. But let's stop pretending that sex before marriage is no big deal and start telling people the truth - for two reasons: One, so that our kids can avoid the problem in the first place; and two, so those who have been negatively affected can learn how they can still succeed by changing the way they think about sex."

I don't think I'd spend time and money going to one of his workshops, but I am confident that his material resonates with a lot of other people! He has a positive, Biblical perspective on marriage.

Ready Player One

by Ernest Cline
Scott County Library paperback 372 pages
genre: SciFi, dystopian future
published 2011

I had enjoyed the movie so much that I finally got the book to read! Typically, I'm adamant about reading the book first before watching the movie . . . and in this case, my original affinity for the movie made me really notice the differences in the book! My daughter-in-law Angela loved the book for that exact reason - she read it before seeing the movie and prefers it.

In essence, the story isn't different, but the movie specifics are extremely different! From the first key to the last, (and even some basic character issues such as when Art3mis and Parzival meet face to face), the book and movie are radically different.

Okay, enough with that! You get the point. I'm not entirely sure why this story resonates so strongly with me. I don't really enjoy video games. I definitely love the 80s pop culture references. I always love the David and Goliath aspect of the underdogs winning. This was a debut novel for Cline and it makes me curious to read his next book, Armada.

I only marked two places. One was disappointing to me. Early in the book when we're becoming acquainted with Wade Watts, the protagonist, he says, "The whole God thing is actually an ancient fairy tale that people have been telling one another for thousands of years. We made it all up. Like Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny." It's telling, though, that the one human being that Wade actually respects, cares about, and responds to is Mrs. Gilmore. "She was a sweet old lady in her mid-seventies, and she always seemed to get up ridiculously early. . . . Mrs. G. was super-religious and spent most of her time in the OASIS, sitting in the congregation of one of those big online megachurches, singing hymns, listening to sermons, and taking virtual tours of the Holy Land. . . . She was always praying for me too. Trying her hardest to save my soul. I never had the heart to tell her that I thought organized religion was a total crock. It was a pleasant fantasy that gave her hope and kept her going . . . "

The other spot made me smile and wonder if Wil Wheaton has read the book and how he responded. On page 201, it says, "It was also time to elect the president and VP of the OASIS User Council, but that was a no-brainer. Like most gunters, I voted to reelect Cory Doctorow and Wil Wheaton (again). There were no term limits, and those two geezers had been doing a kick-ass job of protecting user rights for over a decade." (The preceding paragraphs on the pointlessness of the U.S. government elections are pretty depressing.) "The once-great country into which I'd been born now resembled its former self in name only. It didn't matter who was in charge. Those people were rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic and everyone knew it."

This was a fascinating book and worth a re-read at some point. I'd love to talk with Angela about it sometime.

 

<I wrote the above 6.19.2021. Less than a year later, I recently re-read it and re-watched the movie . . . more on that below!>

 

I marked a few spots that are different from the ones above. When Ogden Morrow is being interviewed about Halliday's contest (page 118), he goes off on IOI.

". . . The last thing Jim would have wanted is for his creation to fall into the hands of a fascist multinational conglomerate like IOI."

"Mr. Morrow, IOI owns this network . . . "

"Of course they do!" Morrow shouted gleefully. "They own practically everything! Including you, pretty boy! I mean, did they tattoo a UPC code on your ass when they hired you to sit there and spout their corporate propaganda?"

The reporter began to stutter, glancing nervously at something off camera.

"Quick!" Morrow said. "You better cut me off before I say anything else!" He broke up into gales of laughter just as the network cut his satellite feed.

This is so close to truth that it's almost scary . . . Big companies have tremendous amounts of power. 

I also marked the spot where Wade decides to force himself to exercise so he doesn't get too heavy (picture the humans in "Wall-E"). "So I made a snap decision and enabled the voluntary OASIS fitness lockout software on my rig. I'd regretted it almost immediately." Here's the page . . . again, this seems so true to life. Some of the technologies in this book are futuristic and some are real now. I ***almost*** wish I had the ability to have technology force me to get some exercise . . .

 

Watching the movie again made me decide that I like some things about the book better and some things about the movie better. I could see me doing a VENN diagram of the differences and similarities . . . but I won't!

I now have Cline's Ready Player Two from the library. I've heard awful reviews, but still plan to read it!

<Below added 10.25.25>

I listened to the audiobook. Wil Wheaton was the narrator . . . so he's definitely "in" on the joke. It makes me think about his appearances on The Big Bang Theory. His adult career seems closely linked to his childhood role on ST: TNG. After writing that, I had to check. He was fifteen years old when he came on the show as Wesley Crusher and 21 when he left. In any case . . . 

I enjoyed the story, though the skepticism about God's existence still bothered me. I'm ready to return this audiobook and move on!

Garden Spells

by Sarah Addison Allen
Scott County Library audiobook 7 CDs
read by Susan Ericksen
genre: paranormal romance / realistic fiction with magic (?)

I borrowed this book in print and audio for my sister for her book club. (Scott County Libraries were ahead of Hennepin County with curbside pickup during this Covid-19 pandemic.) I started to read the print book out of curiosity but had to return it for someone else before I could finish it so I "read" the audiobook.

What I liked: the relationships of the sisters and Evanelle, the descriptions of the food Claire prepared and the properties of different plants, and the storytelling that kept me wondering how things would work out.

What I disliked: Claire's reluctance to trust, the whole magic piece

Odd notes (for my pleasure - sorry blog readers):

• Claire Waverly - main character
• Evanelle - gives things to people before they need them; can't help it
• Sydney - took off at age 18
• Lorelei - Claire's and Sydney's mom - also took off as a teen; was not a good mother
• David's abuse of Sydney - horrible!  Glad he didn't hurt Bay.
• flowers, smells, magic . . . 
• Emma Clark / Clark women and sex - really?
• I love Hunter John! What a wonderful man (and not how I expected him to react at all) . . . but Emma and her mom - yuk!
• Loved the part where Evanelle gave Sydney 50 cents . . . and how she chose to use it. That scene completely redeemed her for me . . . 
• David - what an awful man. And the way this ended. Wow.
• Bay - seeing colors, knowing where things belong . . . 
• The apple tree - one of the best characters!

This is a very well-written book. The narrator did a fine job with the voice work. Even though there are a lot of characters, the way they're introduced into the story works well and I didn't get confused about who was who.

The First Conspiracy: The Secret Plot to Kill George Washington

by Brad Meltzer and Josh Mensch
Scott County Library audiobook 9 CDs
read by Scott Brick
genre: non-fiction, history

This was an interesting change of pace. I disliked studying history as a teenager, and so have many gaps in my knowledge. (And we can *all* grow in our understanding of the past!) The authors told their story primarily in chronological order and it is fact-based BUT with unnecessary (in my opinion) dramatizations. For example, the subtitle . . . and we learn that there were allusions to a murder plot, but not clear evidence of it. The plotters may have just been planning to kidnap or disrupt (definitely disrupt) Washington's efforts.

Governor William Tryon reminded me of President Trump.
I would love to learn more about Henry Knox and what he did during the Revolution. (Bringing cannons from Ticonderoga to Boston . . . brilliant! Plus, he was a book store owner. I love him already.)
It was interesting to hear the Loyalists / Patriots language . . . it made me think of current identities in American society . . . and what it mean to be patriotic.
I would also love to read more about George Washington himself. The importance of integrity and honor - what great qualities!
Gilbert Forbes, the gun smith; Thomas Hickey, the hanged Irishman; and others were involved in the plot against Washington. Interesting that Hickey was the example . . . because he was Irish and they were less valued than others? It would be nice if we had even more first person accounts of the events.

Thomas Paine's Common Sense was so influential! It may be time for me to focus on reading and thinking about this document . . . Published in January of 1776, it was instrumental in marshaling people's opinions in favor of the colonies' separation from Great Britain.

Also an interesting parallel to modern events: the crowds tore down the George III statue! Mob behavior, symbolism, history repeating itself, . . . .lots to talk about here!

By the last part of the book, the sensationalism started to bother me. Was it in the writing or in the reader's inflection? Was it an attempt to make history more exciting? The authors' interview at the end gave a little insight. Josh did most of the research and drafting. Brad was more the dramatist . . . and now I need to see which other Brad Melzer books I've read because I definitely recognize the name!

Catch and Kill

by Ronan Farrow
Scott County Library hardcover 419 pages
genre: investigative reporting

Wow. How interesting that I'm finishing this book just as Matt Lauer spoke out in a "scathing op-ed" to say that Farrow did not do an accurate job of reporting (May 21, 2020). I had started this book earlier in the winter but did not read quickly enough and had to return it to the library. To me, it seems Farrow did an incredibly thorough job vetting his sources. His documentation covers several pages at the end of the book. The patterns of sexual predation by Harvey Weinstein and the money / power to hush up wrongdoing are so saddening.

Page 167 - "Canosa wasn't sure what to do. She had signed a nondisclosure agreement as a condition of her employment with Weinstein. She was still trying to make it as a producer, and was terrified of retaliation. Weinstein could render her unemployable. And then there were the hesitations of any survivor of sexual violence. She'd allowed her wounds to calcify and learned to carry on. She hadn't told her father, or her boyfriend. 'I don't want to suffer more. You know?' she told me. Once, as she'd worked up the nerve to raise the matter with a therapist, 'I saw her at a premier for a Weinstein movie,' Canosa told me. 'I found out she was a producer on one of Harvey's movies.'"

I cannot begin to imagine the shame, pain, anger, and fear that this woman and so many others experienced. For all the amazing movies he has had a hand in making, he absolutely destroyed human beings for his own personal power trip. Over and over again, the reports of his behavior disgusted and horrified me. What an awful man.

Page 240 - "Sorvino decided she'd help and, over the course of several calls, went fully on the record. But the fear in her voice never left. 'When people go up against power brokers there is punishment,' she said. I realized her anxieties went beyond career considerations. She asked if I had security, if I'd thought about the risk of disappearing, of an 'accident' befalling me. I said I was fine, that I was taking precautions, then wondered what precautions I was actually taking, other than glancing over my shoulder a lot."

The whole surveillance / spying angle also blew me away. If you're doing so many awful things that you need to pay out money for lawyers, detectives, fake operatives to mine information from victims, payments to victims to keep them quiet, etc. . . . perhaps you should think about changing your own behavior! Trump almost looks like a nice man in comparison to Weinstein! The fact that our president has also paid out money to keep women quiet for his sexual liaisons just makes me sad.

Page 241 - "Weinstein told her that she was making a huge mistake by rejecting him, and named an actress and a model who he claimed had given in to his sexual overtures and whose careers he said he had advanced as a result. Arquette said she responded, 'I'll never be that girl,' and left. Arquette's story was important because of how closely it hewed to others I'd heard: professional pretext, meeting moved upstairs, hotel room, request for massage, bathrobe."

Gross. What a disgusting, awful man. I'm so sorry this story didn't break fifteen years earlier with the reporting that Ken Auletta had done on Weinstein. I'm sorry that some media power brokers are okay with the idea of "catch and kill" - paying top dollar for a story to make sure they have exclusive rights and then never publishing it. I'm sorry that evil is so prevalent in our world.

Page 254 - "Other industry veterans I spoke with sounded a different note. Weinstein's predation was an open secret, they said, and if they hadn't seen it, they'd heard about at least some of it. Susan Sarandon, the kind of ethical futurist who had stubbornly refused to work with accused predators for years, gamely brainstormed leads. She let out a cackle when I told her what I was up to. 'Oh, Ronan,' she said, going into a teasing, singsong delivery. Not mocking, just delighting at the impending drama about to befall me. 'You're gonna be in trouble.'"

The fact that so many people knew Weinstein was preying on these young women and yet stayed silent . . . makes me think of Edmund Burke. “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.” 

Page 414 - "'You know, the press is as much part of our democracy as Congress or the executive branch or the judicial branch. It has to keep things in check. And when the powerful control the press, or make the press useless, if the people can't trust the press, the people lose. And the powerful can do what they want." 

Igor Ostrovskiy was one of the people  who was hired to tail Ronan Farrow as he was investigating this story. As he realized what was going on, he decided to meet privately with Farrow to share information. He ended up starting his own private investigation business after Black Cube stopped sending him work. As an immigrant with a new baby (born in America), his perspective was seasoned by his earlier life in Ukraine. "Coming from a society where the news was controlled by those in power, I never, ever want to allow this to happen to the country that gave me and my wife and my son a chance." Powerful words.

This book is a powerful and worthwhile read.