The English Masterpiece

By: Katherine Reay

Scott County Library paperback 277 pages plus author's notes, etc.

Published: 2025

Genre: historical fiction

Book club meets tomorrow and I've read the book! Now it's time to blog my notes . . . and there are lots of them. I've really enjoyed Reay's books in the past but this one wasn't a favorite for me. 

 

Lily is an aspiring artist working at the Tate Gallery in London in 1973. Her supervisor, Diana, has been her role model and a driving force in her life. In one fateful moment at an opening of a Picasso exhibit, Lily blurts out a statement that sends her life into a wild frenzy. Mixed in with all this is a fraught family dynamic and a little dash of romance.

 

Page 24: "Can't I just take it back?" . . . And no, whatever one says or does cannot be taken back. Some things can never be taken back.

 

As someone who often blurts without thinking, this made me cringe. One of my favorite (or at least oft-said) verses is "Set a guard over my mouth oh Lord;  keep watch over the door of my lips" from Psalm 141:3. Hurtful or stupid things cannot be unsaid.

Page 28: "Words are powerful things."

I liked the security guard Archie. He and Padraic the janitor at the school were wonderful characters. Here Lily is surprised that the gallery is empty and everyone has gone because of her comment.

Page 34: My sister is ten years older than I am, and we always seem to scrape against each other rather than slide along. She makes me feel juvenile, silly, and frivolous. She says I make her feel clumsy, irrelevant, and useless.

Ah, siblings. It can be difficult to find a good space to appreciate one another and enjoy one another's company. I'm thankful that I get along well with my siblings. So often, family members discount the youngest child because they are older and theoretically wiser. The friction between Lily and Daisy shouldn't have gone on so long! I like the author's word choice in describing scraping rather than sliding.

Page 36: Her words don't help, but they do broaden my perspective from the personal to the universal.

Sometimes we get so focused on our own situation that we forget to take a step back and consider the bigger picture. Here, Lily is thinking about the rest of the family and the economy because of Daisy's words. My strategy if I'm wrestling with something is to say, "In the grand scheme of eternity . . . " because most of the things I fuss about really don't matter in an eternal sense. Again, I like the author's use of "broaden my perspective from the personal to the universal."

Page 54: That day I wandered in and out of the empty classrooms, the half-full studios with stressed students deep into their term-end assignments, and I fell in love. It wasn't just being near art, like one can be when standing in a museum or a gallery; it was being close to the energy of its creation. The messiness, the intimacy, the grandeur, and the soul involved in making art. I sensed both the acumen and ability of those students as surely as I understood their vulnerability and desperation, their rawness and even their heartbreak. They were living Picassos - their souls splayed two-dimensionally across what they strove to create."

This didn't necessarily "speak" to me on a deep level, but I could imagine the intensity and love the idea of being "close to the energy." I think, too, of the passion of teenagers and young adults. There is something about youth that speaks of vibrancy.

Page 56: "You're hiding here in your painting. You've copied others long enough. Freedom takes courage."

Paddy is giving Lily advice and encouraging her to move forward. She grabs hold of that last comment and starts to process her life and her goals. It makes sense that she copied the masters to learn more about painting and different techniques, but that's all she's been doing.

Page 70: Here the memory grows technicolor vivid, but maybe that's because I've replayed it in my head so many times I've created it rather than actually recall it. Yet that's art - perception and reality merging in a new form.

Lily is thinking of the childhood incident that led to her choking, her mother driving her to emergency, the car accident, . . . I have a "memory" of leading my Grandpa Pahl to the pantry to get a cookie from the cookie jar. There's even a photo! But do I actually remember it, or has the story been told to me so many times that I recall a story instead of the actual event?

Page 132: When does growth end and mere copying, forging, and even dying begin?

Lily is contemplating her art and her life. Right after this, she runs into Conor (the American insurance investigator) and then they run into Pierce Brosnan. Later in the Author's Notes, Reay writes,

 ". . . I learned that Brosnan actually attended St. Martin's School and studied art around the same time I had my fictional Lily working there.

Well, that set off my imagination and I wonder if a moment within this story might not have led to that brilliant scene in his later movie - . . . . There you go - that is how Pierce Brosnan ended up in this novel. And if he ever reads it, I hope he thoroughly enjoys his brief shining role."

Page 136: I say art is love, but it's also risk. I don't see love in my work, and I definitely don't see any risk. I can't take risks. Financially or otherwise. Needs always outweigh wants.

Lily is right in that needs outweigh wants. But she isn't being a very creative problem solver, either. She spends a lot of time contemplating her art and her life in this story, but there's plenty of action to keep the story moving along.

Page 169: I have no control. I never did.

It takes her long enough to get here! 

Page 170: That's what I would chase - if I had the time, the ability, and the talent. Not expressionism or surrealism. I want to see without subterfuge and distortion. I want truth.

It's nice that she wants to paint truth. I've learned more about different art movements subbing in Sarah's art class than elsewhere . . . 

Page 180 holds the back story to her older siblings and their experience during WWII with Operation Pied Piper. It seemed as though the whole back story / family history was a bit disjointed. Fascinating, but not very clear.

Page 188: He nods to the teakettle, which begins to hiss. He waits as she takes it off the stove and pours water through the strainer into the cup. Tension builds within her. He is waiting for some purpose. She can feel it. His timing always plays to his advantage.

The relationship between Diana and her much older husband Heinrich was downright creepy. He groomed her and manipulated her. They were both quite twisted.

Page 225: Heinrich smiles, something long, slow, menacing. "Pride and greed are powerful vices. Ubiquitous too. Plenty of the disreputable and greedy are in New York."

Again, Heinrich was a creep and sneaky. I thought his observation about pride and greed were apropos.

Page 230: "When did you need to apologize for an accident that happened twenty-two years ago? You took that all on yourself. That's pride, my girl, not humility."

Lily's mom finally has the talk with her she ought to have had many years earlier! How did they let that much dysfunction foster?

In chapter 30, Lily goes to Diana's house to confront her. I was thinking, "Are you kidding me? That's the worst place you can go." I understand why the author had that happen. It's certainly an interesting part of the book. This book was interesting but not fantastic.

The Let Them Theory

By: Mel Robbins and Sawyer Robbins

Scott County Library hardcover 299 pages plus extra stuff

Published: 2024

Genre: non-fiction, self-help / advice

This gal is on fire! I waited to get the book and couldn't renew it because there's a long list behind me. As I put lots of post-it notes in here, I thought, "Perhaps I should just buy a copy." But I prefer not to add to my possessions, so here we go!

A friend had originally recommended Mel Robbins and her books to me specifically for one of my sisters. I have now read parts of High Five and The 5 Second Rule and all of this book (though it was due back four days ago and I need to be done). Robbins and her co-author daughter have a lot of sound advice that's applicable to pretty much every person. She is really clear in saying that her advice is for adults and one needs to apply the ideas differently in parenting children.

Page 1: If you've ever been in this situation, you understand how monumental even the simplest tasks seem: getting out of bed, opening your bills, being fully present with your family, cooking a nice meal, applying for a job, going for a walk, canceling that subscription, or even just being honest about the extent to which you're struggling . . . . 

This hit me because I don't deal with these situations. Except for when I had the exhaustion related to a newborn baby, I generally have a "get 'r done!" mentality. I need to have compassion for others who are so defeated that the smallest of things (to me) seem monumental to them. 

Page 3: . . . Wait a minute, I can feel horrible and still do what I need to do? Yes, Mel, you can. And it worked.

She's referencing the five second rule, which I had read about already in that book. But her story is powerful. It makes a lot of sense to share what changed her life. The countdown of 5-4-3-2-1 and just going. Doing the thing. That was a powerful revelation.

Page 5: When I had been drowning in my problems, I felt like I was the only one who had trouble doing the things I needed to do. It's not true. We all struggle with motivation. It's a universal problem . . . 

Feeling isolated and realizing that you're not alone. People can be so funny about trying to be enough on their own.

Page 7: Learning how to push yourself to take action when you are afraid or full of self-doubt or overwhelmed with excuses is a life skill you can learn. Once you master it, you'll understand that you can achieve anything through small, consistent moves forward.

I love this! Small, consistent things are possible for anyone. Sometimes I psych myself out of doing something because it seems too big to handle. Small, consistent changes and forward progress make a difference. I'm realizing as I start this blogging that I have done pages 1,3,5, and 7 so far. Although I have a lot of post-its in this book, they're not every odd numbered page the whole way!

Page 12: The reality is, no matter how hard you try or what you do, you cannot control other people.

Such a simple truth, but this book hammers over and over that YOU can only control your own reactions. When you get upset with other people, you "let them" do, say, think what they want. Then you "let me" choose how to respond. It saves a lot of anguish and stress if you adopt this mentality.

Page 18: The truth is, other people hold no real power over you unless you give it to them.

Yes. It isn't worth getting worked up over other people's choices. Adults make their own choices and have to live with the consequences.

Page 20: As I stood there in the kitchen, I allowed this fact to wash over me: time was passing, and I wished it would slow down. That's the cruel fact about time. It's going to keep passing, whether you slow down or not. The time that you have with the people that you love is like a melting ice cube.

 

Yes! Time is time, but this life is short and precious. The older I get, the more I appreciate that. Yet, I still spend way too much of life watching YouTube videos and dealing with my long to-do lists . . . 

 

Page  24 holds the scene where Mel's youngest is heading to prom and he's unconcerned about the rain, the lack of a dinner reservation, etc. She is stressing out big time and her older daughter finally yells, "LET. THEM." This is her epiphany. If the teens get soaking wet, eat in a crowded taco place, etc. Just let them. It's their prom. In the ensuing pages, there are dozens of photos of people's "let them" tattoos. I'm not a fan of tattoos, but I understand how those words can help people to realize that they only control their own thoughts, words, actions, and reactions. My next post-it was reiterating that we can't control other people. (Repetition is the key to mastery.)

Page 110: When you say Let Them, you give other people the space to feel their emotions without needing to fix them. When you say Let Me, you do what's right for you, even if it upsets someone, which is how you take responsibility for your own life.

 

She is saying fairly simple, straightforward things, but I could constantly picture people and situations in my own life that paint the examples she shares. In the family I was raised in, we were constantly reacting so that we didn't upset someone else. Ultimately, we ended up in knots trying to control other people's feelings!

 

Page  111: Emotional maturity isn't something you're born with or that just happens. It's a skill that takes time, practice, and a desire to learn.

This is spot on. Some people never seem to grow up in this. My dad was very emotionally immature. In his 80s, he was still pouting and using emotional manipulation. It was pretty sad.

Page 117: I decided to just put the whole page here. Good stuff.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Page 118: And yes, I still get frustrated when I slip up. But that's the point: It's not about being perfect; it's about being kind to yourself and continuing to grow.

I love this! It's under the subheading, "But What If You're the Problem?" The idea of progress, not perfection is very helpful to me.

Page 124: It's not your job to protect everybody else from feeling emotions. Your job and responsibility is to live your life in a way that is aligned with your values, and what you know deep down is true for you.

Live your values. Don't feel that you need to be responsible for others' feelings. For me, I'll add strive to be a Christ follower and emulate His example.

Page 137: Psychologists will tell you that the root cause of many disorders is an obsessive need for control. . . . anytime that you try to control something that you can't, it just makes you feel more out of control and powerless.

I used to be quite the control freak. Every once in a while, Louie accuses me of trying to control things I can't and I get frustrated with him. I need to stop and ponder. Am I having a "my way or the highway moment" or just expressing my opinion on how things could go? As long as my opinions don't turn in to the expectation that others do what I want!

Page 145: "You just have to be what most people aren't: consistent, determined, and willing to work for it."

This is a Tom Brady quote, but she references other people and situations to make the point that if you want to see change, you need to "do the reps." One can't get a muscled physique quickly and without effort; lots of things in life are like that. Be consistent, determined, and willing to work for it.

Page 170: It's easier to blame someone else, and sit in your anger, than it is to take responsibility for yourself.

Ooh . . . this made me think of some people. I need to be careful about offering help to certain people. If they don't like how things turn out, I become the bad guy. No thanks.

Page 181: The warmth you offer others always finds its way back to you.

I like this! With all the negative things in our world, country, media, etc., I love to focus on kindness and being a blessing. This also makes me think of Lou saying, "The more smiles I give away, the more I get back!"

Page 182-3: She's talking about making friends as an adult. This is not something I struggle with, but I like her advice!

1. Compliment people everywhere you go.

2. Be curious.

3. Smile and say hello to anyone and everyone you pass or meet.

4. Do this without expectation.

This really goes back to her earlier advice about offering warmth. I'd much rather focus on being kind than on myself.

Page 191: The reality is, people only change when they feel like changing. It doesn't matter how much you want someone to change. It doesn't matter how valid your reasons are. Or that you are right in your opinion that they should change. Or how big the consequences are if they don't change. If someone doesn't feel like changing, they won't.

 

Again, she really hammers home some messages but I think we forget. We want something for a person and we see how much it could improve their life, but we need to remember that change needs to be personally motivated and driven.

Page 195: The fact is, change is hard for everyone, including you. No one wants to feel pressure from you, because they are already feeling it from themselves.

 

Good point. There are some things I want to change (like going to bed in a timely fashion and not getting sleep-deprived, being a better listener,  . . . ) but it's hard to change habits.

Page 196: Change is never a cakewalk. If it were fun and easy, the person you love would already be doing it.

 

This made me smile. Duh. If change were easy, it could happen quickly.

Page 211: The best way to do this is to come prepared to listen to the other person wholeheartedly without interrupting them.

She's talking about the ABC Loop (Apologize and Ask open-ended questions, Back off and observe their Behavior, Celebrate progress while you continue to model the Change.)  I'm too quick to talk, to chime in with my ideas, and really slow to truly listen to what others have to say.

Page 226: As much as you may love someone and believe in them and would do anything in the world to make their pain go away, you cannot want someone else's sobriety, healing, or health more than they do.

So true! It's hard to let go when you care deeply about them, though.

Page 228: The Let Them Theory teaches you that helping others doesn't mean solving their problems for them - it means giving them the space, support, and tools to do it themselves.

 

Giving someone space, support, and tools instead of jumping in to "save the day" - radical.

Page 229: You can't want somebody's sobriety or their healing or their financial freedom or their ambition or their happiness more than they do.

 

Again, repetition helps get the message across. You can't fix things for other people; they have to decide they want it.

Page 235: Look at people's struggles as an opportunity to support them in discovering their strengths.

 

This was an interesting take. Trust people enough to encourage them and build them up as they work toward solving their problems.

Page 244: You can create an environment for positive change by offering therapy, cooking healthy meals, or having conversations, and focusing on open-ended questions.

 

I like that she offers specific suggestions other than giving people money in helping them out.