Daughters of Arraweelo: Stories of Somali Women

by Ayaan Adan

Dakota County Library paperback 220 pages plus glossary

Published: 2022

Genre: Non-fiction, personal stories

I checked this out on behalf of my sister to prepare for the author's visit at a meeting for her work. Being a curious individual, I wanted to read the book too. I've not yet finished it, but it is interesting to read about these people's experiences and perspectives. It was also interesting to listen to the author yesterday. 

 

This collection of stories helps me better understand Somali women - both their cultural identity and the individual human beings who sometimes appear as "other" to me and my experience. Most of the stories I've read so far are about women in their 20s. I'm eager to get to the stories from older women. No matter the culture, sometimes age brings a different perspective. It was also interesting to me to learn that Minnesota has the largest population of Somali people in the United States.

Some of the women used their real names and some used pseudonyms to protect their identity. One woman talked about her experience in a university class that was very divisive. 

People didn't care about the required readings, and they weren't interested in constructive dialogue. Instead, everyone wanted to be right, all the time. They wanted the story of a battle to regale their friends or followers with, always exaggerated and without a modicum of self-awareness. Students came into the class with the baggage of their traumas or experiences and didn't shy away from projecting, generalizing, and breaking the basic rules of social agreements. Things like not assuming intention, giving others a chance to speak, and generally being kind. This class was a no-man's-land. Rule and order had no meaning here. It made for both an exciting and an exhausting hour. (pg 31)

I wonder what the professor's goal was. This doesn't seem like a very effective way to educate.

 

I loved the section where "Habon Hirsi" talked about her experiences and feelings wearing a hijab (head, hair, and chest covering), a jilbaab (full length cloak), and a khamaar (head scarf). (I really, really appreciated the glossary and consulted it often.) When she wore the khamaar and went shopping for clothing, she suddenly was confronted with body image issues that hadn't been a problem for her before. "In hindsight, I came to appreciate hijab for how it protected me from society and myself." (page 43)

Another woman wrote about gender roles and frustration.

Growing up, I hated how strict my parents were with my sisters and me, while they were so easygoing with my brothers. I started cleaning around fifth or sixth grade. Cleaning and cooking are absolutely necessary life skills; I have no problem doing them. The issue for me was cleaning up after grown men. Do they not have hands? The unfairness just creates resentment and anger. If I asked about why they didn't help out around the house, I was told to mind my business. It was so frustrating. They were just as capable. And they were smug about it. Like they had one up on me because I'm a girl. They laughed about it. (page 51)

That would have sent me over the edge! My dad had some of that attitude, especially after we visited relatives in Canada. Women were supposed to serve and be servile; men were supposed to sit back and enjoy. Arg!

This part really struck me. In writing about *why* so many Somalis have left their home country and come to the U.S., she writes, "If it was safe, I know we would've stayed. Nobody really wants to leave home unless they have to." (page 86). With what's happening in Ukraine right now, these words really ring true. I believe most people would rather stay in their home country. The extended family, the culture, the landscape, the feeling of being home. . . Many of the women that Adan interviewed talked about Somalia being home even though they've spent the majority of their lives in Minnesota. It makes me sad that there's so much violence in the world. Most Americans are oblivious to how easy life is for us here.

I hope to read the rest of the stories, but time is of the essence!

I blogged the above on 3.31.22 then I finished the book and emailed the additions below on 4.5.22 from Louise's house.

Page 98: "Every Somali girl knows the eldest daughter's burden. . . . It's often a thankless and invisible job, but behind every household there's usually at least one daughter manning the fort."

 

This came up over and over again. It makes me glad to be a youngest in my family and not part of this culture. That seems like a lot of pressure.

 

Page 107: "I know I am an American, legally and by geography,but it's hard to identify that way."

 

 

I don't know what else I wanted to write about this, but it caught my attention. I think not fitting in is something all of us experience from time to time in life, but it would be hard to deal with this kind of identity issue.

 

Page 113: "The biggest challenge I faced in school was the lowered expectations of my teachers and administrators. Because I was an immigrant kid, they expected me to fail.

 

 

This is heart-breaking to me. I wonder if there are times that I lowered my expectations for students (for whatever reason) instead of expecting them to rise to a learning occasion. 

Page 122: "I grew up with the melting pot analogy and eventually the salad bowl.To me, assimilating is like taking  beautiful filet mignon and mushing it up to ground beef in order to make meat loaf. Yes, technically it's still there, but was it worth it? The filet was more valuable as itself,before being churned through this machine."

 

 

"The melting pot" analogy has been revised when talking about immigrants in America, but so many of us learned this that it seems "right." Also, the tossed salad idea . . . analogies can be helpful or they can be hurtful. We're talking about human beings, personal identity, and cultural identity. It's more complex than a quick word picture.

 

Page 129: Qorsho Hassan - TOTY2020 - Mrs. Fulmer (positive 4th grade memory) 129 . . . this whole chapter! impact of educators - for good or for ill

 

Page 139: "When White teachers teach anti-racism, they are praised and recognized.When a Black teacher teaches antiracism, that is seen as a threat and dangerous. Is it because people hate the message or is it because it suddenly becomes dangerous when a Black Somali Muslim woman says it?" 

 

 

I looked up Qorsho Hassan after reading this chapter. What an amazing, articulate woman. I'm so sorry that she experienced such backlash after winning Teacher of the Year. She sounds like an extraordinary educator.

 

Page 140: "If you're not actively anti-racist, then being  a teacher is not for you. Students need more from their teachers than passive non-racists.Fight for your students, or get out of the way for those of us who will."

 

 

Those are strong words, but her argument makes sense.

 

Page 149  - hearing our elders' stories . . . yes. I wish I had recorded more of my parents' stories when I had the opportunity.

 

Page 160: "I've had the privilege of attending school in different countries. Out of all the places, Dubai was definitely the most comprehensive and rigorous. In the States,I kept thinking, This can't be learning, it's too easy, where's the catch?" 

 

Ouch! This makes me sad, but I'm not shocked. I feel as though educators have gotten tired of fighting angry parents and disobedient, disrespectful students.

 

pg 163 school counselor - I think I screen shotted this page . . . but too much time has elapsed. Not sure what I wanted to say.

 

Under the Bayou Moon

by Valerie Fraser Luesse

Dakota County Library paperback 324 pages

Published: 2021

Genre: Christian historical fiction

 

We had a lovely book club discussion on Monday night. Luesse is a delightful author and she wrote this story so that each of us could see what she was describing. 

 

Main character Ellie Fields is a teacher heading into Louisiana's bayou country. Originally from Alabama, she's like a babe in the woods in New Orleans before heading into the small community of Bernadette to teach. Raphe is the man who has seen beauty (the white alligator) and horrors (the loss of most of his family in a hurricane) in the bayou. Heywood is a genial man Ellie meets in NO and then encounters again in Bernadette.

 

Though many of us at book club anticipated different paths (the center of conflict, what occurs at school vs. elsewhere, etc.), we all enjoyed the book and had different take-aways.

 

Page 49 - "He really thought French speakers were holding back the whole state. It's an unfortunate quality of human beings that we're prone to condemn the unfamiliar."

 

This observation made me think of POTUS #45 and Mexicans . . . 

 

Page 71 - "Cajuns didn't worship alligators anymore than Catholics worshiped statues. The very idea that such a misguided notion might destroy something so purely beautiful as the white alligator was more than he could stand."

 

I liked that first line. People (including me) can be quick to judge . . . but we need to think about some of our thoughts, words, and actions before casting about and causing distress.

 

Page 142 - "The thought of a life without her made the hole in his heart so deep that nothing could possibly fill it. And yet he had to ask:Where does love end and selfishness begin? Or could it be possible for one to overcome the other if you loved somebody so much that their happiness was your own?"

 

The first line of this is NOT what caught my attention. His contemplation of  love and selfishness, of truly showing love by wanting that person to have the best - that I like.

Page 237 - "But it was typical of small Southern communities. Things went on as they always had, with nobody ever questioning the reason why."

I don't think it's just in small Southern communities. A lot of human groups - churches, organizations, businesses, families - continue to do what they've "always" done without questioning why. Tradition and familiarity can be very comforting.

Earmuffs for Everyone! How Chester Greenwood Became Known as the Inventor of Earmuffs

by Meghan McCarthy

Libby ebook 50pages

Published: 2015

Genre: non-fiction children's book

I had been grabbing lots of children's books that were available on Libby so I could share with my grandson. (Most of the Paw Patrol books were already checked out . . . waiting lists!) I ended up reading this for myself and not to him!

This illustrated volume about the invention of earmuffs is adorable, interesting, and informative. The author gives credit to the many people who developed different ear coverings. Why did Chester Greenwood become known as "the" inventor? Because at age 19, he got a patent from the U.S. government!

He was an inventor and loved finding ways to make money. This was a delightful little book.

A Christmas Carol

by Charles Dickens

Libby ebook 181 pages

Published: 1843

Genre: classic, ghost story, moral fable

I'm not entirely sure why I checked this out. I know I wanted a book on my phone that would be there to read "just in case" - and I needed to find something that was not super popular / had a hard return date.

I assumed I'd read the story. After all, I've seen a performance at the Guthrie. I've definitely read abridged versions many times in language arts classes. I've seen Disney versions and parodies. I'm extremely familiar with the story.

Yet as I read, I found new details that seemed completely new. When Scrooge is traveling with the Ghost of Christmas Present, do you remember the lighthouse and the ship? I didn't. I love the many versions I've seen, but it was really good to read the original.

I'm still really impressed that Dickens wrote it so quickly and that the publication made a big societal impact. We watched the movie The Man Who Invented Christmas (about Dickens writing this book) at our December cookie party. I know a lot of it is fiction, but quite a bit is based on fact. Dickens is one of my favorite authors. I'm glad I read this!

Death on the Nile

by Agatha Christie

Libby audiobook 9:15 hours

read by Kenneth Branagh

Published: 2020 (this recording) / book in 1937

Genre: murder mystery, detective Hercule Poirot

 

 I thought I had read this before, but it was not familiar to me . . . other than the ways it is similar to Murder on the Orient Express. The range of characters, the clues, the interwoven story lines, . . . and of course, Hercule's confident sleuthing.

Lynette Ridgeway is incredibly wealthy. After stealing her best friend's boyfriend, the newlywed honeymooners head to Egypt. I actually considered the true murder suspects before dismissing them. Then I was convinced it was someone else. It was interesting how the story progressed . . . with three murders total. (I would have become incredibly paranoid if I'd been on that boat!)

Branagh's vocal work was fine, but his "female" voices weren't that great. All in all, this kept my attention (even though I like Miss Marple better than Poirot.)

Murder in an Irish Cottage

 by Carlene O'Connor

Libby audiobook 9:30 hours

read by: ???

Published: 

Genre: Murder mystery

I didn't like this story initially, but kept listening to it (of course). My favorite part was main character Siobhan ("Sheh - vahn"). I also really liked the narrator's accent - that Irish lilt gets me every time!

There were lots of clues and lots of suspects. I don't want to leave any spoilers here, but it was wonderful to finally get to the resolution at the end. 

I didn't like Macdara's cousin Jane. She was a piece of work. I didn't like the fairies, fairy rings, cursed cottage, etc. 

This quote made me "rewind" a bunch of times and park my car to write down:

Until one experienced a profound loss of their own, it was impossible to explain that sorrow never vanishes. It was a war, fought not in long drawn-out battles but in everyday unexpected moments.

Siobhan is head of the household (six siblings) since the death of their parents. This really struck me.

Gastroanomalies: Questionable Culinary Creations from the Golden Age of American Cookery

 by James Lileks

Dakota County Library hardcover 176 pages

Published: 2007

Genre: Non-fiction, humor

 

I think this one was even funnier than the other Lileks book I read recently! He takes old cookbooks and advertisements and writes hilarious commentary on the pictures. Some of the ones in this book were grotesque. I include just one sample of his creativity here. He doesn't tell us the actual name of this particular dish.

His commentary says "Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who's the barfiest dish of all? It's another inscrutable pan-o-heave on top of some Martian flatworms. Even the decorative cherub on the mirror is disgusted by this thing, and that takes some doing. The little guy's seen a lot."

Other Words for Home

by Jasmine Warga

Scott County Library hardcover 332 pages

Published: 2019

Genre: YA realistic fiction

 

This is one of this year's Maud Hart Lovelace award nominees. Tween Jude has to leave Syria with her pregnant mother while her father and brother stay in the increasingly dangerous situation at home. Her father wants to keep his head down and avoid trouble, but her older brother wants to fight injustice. In America, Jude tries to figure out her identity and place. This story is told in prose poetry style and is beautifully written.

 

Page 16 - "It still feels strange to ask my brother this question. His presence at ghadah used to be as certain as the sunset, but now that has also changed."

 

 Throughout the story, unfamiliar words are used. I opted to not look for a glossary (included on page 333) and just used context clues. (ghadah = "the big family meal of the day, usually lunch")

Page 23 - "Fatima and I had never been to that movie theater or any movie theater and we tried to pretend not to be stunned by the soft red velvet seats that are so dense you can make a handprint in the fabric or the wide flat white screen that is larger than anything I'd ever seen."

When Sammy (a visitor) took Jude and Fatima to a movie theater in Syria, the girls are amazed at what they experience. Reading this made me think of how much American kids take for granted.

Page 49 - "I am learning how to be sad and happy at the same time."

This was so sweet. Jude is sad to be leaving home and half her family, but she is joyful upon learning that her mother is pregnant with a new baby.

Page 70 - ". . . I hear the warning in my aunt's voice. That is something powerful enough to transcend oceans: a mama's ability to say something without actually saying it."

Jude and her mom move in with her mom's brother and family. The American daughter Sarah struggles with sharing her home, school, and time with a girl who barely knows English. But moms - they can speak volumes with their looks and tones.

Page 92 - "Just like I am no longer a girl. I am a Middle Eastern girl. A Syrian girl. A Muslim girl. Americans love labels. They help them know what to expect. Sometimes, though, I think labels stop them from thinking."

This made me a little sad because I think it can be true. Label something or someone and close your mind. 

Page 129 - "As I leave her room I think of the Arabic proverb that says: She cannot give what she does not have."

Here, Jude is thinking of her cousin Sarah. Astute observation.

Page 161 - <Spoiler alert!!!>

"But on the day Mama tells me that Issa is gone, the sky is bright, and I'm happy because in math class my teacher, Mr. Anderson, asked me a question in front of everyone and I got the answer right. In English. In front of everyone."

I read that and thought, Oh no! Issa died! But then I kept reading and found that he had gone to Aleppo, where the fighting was more fierce. And later, it's a very happy moment in the story when Jude gets to see him and video conference with him. Her brother meant so much to her. It was also such a Murphy's Law thing - on a day when things are going so well and she's so happy . . . bad news.

Page 168 - "I search every day for a clue about why I deserve to be here in Aunt Michelle's kitchen, safe and fed. When so many others just like me are not."

Ouch. Again, I don't think most American kids realize how incredibly blessed they are.

Page 221 - "On the day of tryouts, there are so many people in the auditorium and all of them have racing hearts and sweaty palms. There is enough energy in here to power a train, an airplane, a small country."

Yes, I can imagine all that middle school energy . . . 

This was a lovely book. It was also educational in many respects.

Not All Heroes

by Josephine Cameron

Libby ebook 432 pages

Published: 2021

Genre: YA realistic

Liked:

• Zinnia (main character) and her ways of dealing with hurt and disappointment.
• The school dynamic with Kris, Trevor, Jade, etc.
• The happy ending and positive message.

 

Disliked:

• Trying to keep the characters and their superhero names straight.
• It wasn't super engaging (not the way her Mermaid book was!)
  

 

 

Page 83 - "Empathy is a superpower. Caring is a superpower. Courage is a superpower!"

(Crystal Warrior talking to the real life super hero group.)

Page 309 - "'Here's what I think,' she said. 'It's hard to be a human. Sometimes it helps to say it out loud. Ask for what you need. If you let things slide for too long, they can pile up and get really heavy.'"

(The school counselor, Mrs. Pryor, talking to Zinnia and her mom.)

The London House

by Katherine Reay

Dakota County Library paperback 347 pages

Published: 2021

Genre: Historical fiction

We had a good discussion at book club on Monday night. This book was more serious and complex than Reay's other books that we've read, but it also was less "Christian." Other than references to C.S. Lewis and absolute truth (toward the end of the book), it was about people, relationships, history, etc. but not really about faith in God. (Perhaps the author is trying to reach an audience that would reject "Christian" fiction?)

The main character Caroline Payne has never really dealt with the loss of her sister Amelia when they were 8 and 9 years old. This parallels her grandmother Margaret's loss of her twin Caroline ("Caro" - whom our protagonist was named for) during WWII. There are many other parallels, but the unraveling of the history of what really happened to Caro in the 1940s is sparked by Mat, a college friend of Caroline's.

There's plenty of history, some mystery, and dashes of romance. I put lots of post-it notes in the book, so I'll try to be brief with this. Overall, I liked this book, but didn't love it. The past was discovered mostly in the letters Caro wrote and the diary Margo kept.

Page 9 - "My belief is that those stories, your story, also provide a sense of hope. They assure us that when bad things happen, life continues, and that we humans are resilient and endure. Hope emerges from tragedy." 

This is Mat talking to Caroline. I agree that stories are powerful. They can also be painful. And the same people might have very different perspectives on an event . . . this also makes me think of the Storyworth stories I'm writing this year.

Page 114 - "If he saw even a fraction of what Creighton saw, I understand why he watches Europe so closely. How could the world ever endure such horrors again?"

This is from Margo's journal and references the "Great War" (aka WWI) and the unthinkable that was coming - WWII. But when I read it, I got the chills thinking about last week's invasion of Ukraine by Russia. I'm horrified that Putin is doing what he wants and the rest of the world seems to just be watching. 

Page 128 - "The irony of my indictment struck me - I was the one who survived that day, yet how well did I embrace life?"

Caroline is starting to realize that just as her grandmother had been altered dramatically by the loss of her sister, so has she. Loss and grief can be so difficult to work through! I can't imagine an eight year old having to deal with the loss of her sister in a horrific accident and not getting serious help to work through the emotional impact of that!

Page 134-5 The letter from Caro to Margo dated July 23, 1936 says in part, "Everything here is shocking, Margo - in all the best ways. There are so many things to taste, experience, think, discuss, and debate. At home, we were fed one way of doing things and one way to think. The door cracked open at Brilliantmont, but here it's been blown off its hinges."

You can feel Caro's youth, excitement, and worldview change in this letter. It's interesting that for a long time in Paris, she saw only the glamour and excitement but missed the impending danger. Brilliantmont is the Swiss boarding school she was sent to at age 16 when Margo contracted scarlet fever.

Page 137 - "'When something bad happens,' she continued, 'it's easy to blame someone else, and in some cases maybe it is their fault, but that doesn't matter. Not in the end. What does matter is how long we hold on to that hurt or that anger. We can magnify the pain, making it worse and worse until it devours us, or we can forgive it and get on with life.'"

I love Caroline's mother's growth and wisdom! Even though we didn't really "meet" her "before" character, we know through Caroline's experience that change has happened.

Page 138 - "There is a relational beauty to food, to cooking. Gifts I had forgotten, and I'm sorry for that."

Caroline's mom talking about moving in to take care of her former mother-in-law. The house renovations sounded incredible! And I agree that cooking can be therapeutic in a way.

Pages 162-3 - The pages where Margo is visiting Caro in Paris and this is described in her journal: "What they meant was my provincial ideas were so antiquated and passé, they've become cute. Furthermore, I am an idiot. They didn't say it, but everyone's tone dripped with condescension."

I could picture this so vividly! Poor Margo!

Page 173 - "Life is too short, Margo, to cut out the ones we love. I refuse to be the one who stops trying to bridge the gap between us."

A letter from Caro to her sister. From Paris in 1938. Life is too short to let brokenness in important relationships sever us from one another.

Page 198 - "It was a powerful word - an elusive, beautiful word of belonging."

Reay does such a beautiful job of making "we" a powerful word. But I'm too lazy to type it all right now.